TOW The Lie
by Llew
Summary: Someone lies, that leads to problems. I'm not good with summaries. So read it if you wanna know more. C&M Please R&R [Finished]
1. Chapter 1

Hi! Ok, this is my first fanfic ever. I dedicate this story to Vikki. Without her encouragement I hadn't even have started to write. And I want to thank my sister for her help. Thank you, Tanja.  
  
Disclaimer: The characters in this story are not mine. They belong to Kaufman and Crane, I think.  
  
****************  
  
TOW The Lie  
  
It was one of these hot New Yorker summer days. Chandler Bing was in his apartment enjoying his day off. He sat on the couch with a cold beer in his hand and thought his life couldn't get any better. Three month ago he married the love of his life. A smile crept over his face at the thought of Monica. Since the day she became his wife he was looking forward to the rest of his life. Something he never did before. Actually, he couldn't wait for the next steps. He often found himself daydreaming during the last months. With the first child they would stay in the apartment and then they would buy a house outside the city before the second child was born.  
  
He was pulled out of his thoughts when the door opened and Rachel Green walked toward the living room. She looked really uncomfortable. And since she was four month pregnant and had the full benefit of morning sickness it wasn't a wonder that she didn't take the summer heat too well.  
  
"You go the short way from Ross' and mine apartment to here and you are drenched in sweat. This weather is killing me." She plopped down next to him with a sigh. "Thank god the air condition is working again. When did Treager fix it?" Rachel asked while making herself comfortable on the couch.  
  
"Some time this morning. He said we had luck too get it fixed this fast. Apparently there is quite a bunch of buildings with broken air conditions. And the maintenance services are booked for weeks." Chandler took another gulp of his beer before he placed it on a coaster on the couch table. "And how are you? Is the morning sickness still tormenting you?"  
  
"Ugh, it's getting better. But that's not the only side effect during pregnancy. Now that I start showing I feel really fat. I think I'll never get a man to look at me anymore."  
  
"Aww, come on. You're not fat. You are pregnant. And believe me, men can see the difference." He placed an arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer. "And you know what? You have already this glowing that all pregnant women get. It makes you very sexy for the men." He smiled down at her as she looked with a hopeful look up at him.  
  
"Wow, that is so sweet of you." With that she leaned in and kissed him on the mouth. But before he could pull back they both heard a gasp and a thump behind them when Monica let her purse fall to the ground.  
  
With a shocked expression on her face she saw Chandler jump up from the couch and away from Rachel.  
  
When Chandler made his way toward the kitchen where Monica stood he saw the tears in her eyes.  
  
"Monica, this is not what it looks like." He said trying to touch her shoulder. But she pulled away, before he could come near enough. With a hurt look in his eyes he watched her turn on her heels and storm out of the apartment. He threw a glance at Rachel who still sat dumbstrucked on the sofa before he followed Monica out of the apartment and down the stairs. A moment after the door slammed shut Rachel came out of her trance and left.  
  
*************  
  
"Monica, please wait! Let me explain!" Chandler was now running down the pavement, trying to catch up with his wife. He reached for her elbow to stop her. At this she whirled around and glared at Chandler with tears running down her cheeks. The pain he saw in her eyes broke his heart. "Monica, please, you have to believe me. It was nothing. Rachel and I were talking and all of the sudden she kissed me. That's when you came in. I didn't kiss back. Please, Monica. Say something."  
  
"Why, Chandler? Why with Rachel?" Monica asked, her voice breaking. It was like this her whole life. What ever she wanted Rachel would get. She'd thought that had changed since they both entered adulthood. But apparently she was wrong. "I trusted you Chandler, with all what I'm worth." She was sobbing by now.  
  
"Then trust me now. You have to believe me, Monica. I would never, never do something to hurt you." He too was crying but didn't bother to dry his tears. He watched Monica hopefully. She had her head down. When she looked up he saw a look of pure hate in her eyes and he took a step back.  
  
"How can I believe you? I know what I saw!" Monica almost yelled. "And this is so typical. Always Rachel. Why does everyone prefer Rachel over me?"  
  
"What are you talking about? I don't want Rachel. I never wanted her. I want you." Chandler said confused. He didn't know how he could get it in Monica's head that nothing happened. "Monica, I." Chandler started but was interrupted from Monica.  
  
"Y'know what Chandler? Save it. I can't hear it anymore." With that she turned around and walked away. Chandler stood there, too shocked to move. By the time he had snapped out of it she was out of sight. Depressed he went back to the apartment.  
  
*************  
  
TBC.  
  
OK, that's the beginning. But there's more to come. I'm new at this writing stuff, so any comments are welcome. 


	2. Chapter 2

DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.  
  
  
  
Monica walked aimless through the streets till she ended up in front of Rachel's door. She knocked before she opened it.  
  
"Rachel, are you here?" She called as soon as she entered the apartment.  
  
A moment later Rachel emerged from her bedroom. Her eyes were puffy and it was obvious that she had been crying too. "Monica, I am so sorry. I."  
  
"What are you sorry about?" Monica cut her off. "That you took something that was mine? Again? Or that I caught you? Y'know, I thought we were both grown ups and could be happy for the other. You saw how happy I was and you had to destroy it. Is that it? That is what you always do. Why? What is your problem?!" Monica was furious now and paced through the living room like a trapped animal.  
  
Maybe it was the hormones, but when she had thought about the situation during the afternoon she came to the decision that she couldn't tell Monica the truth. She knew that if she told Monica what really happened she would lose her best friend forever. And she knew that if she lost Monica, she would lose the rest of her friends as well. And Ross. She needed Ross. She couldn't raise the baby on her own. Just the thought of it let her panic.  
  
She couldn't come up with a reason why she had kissed Chandler. But she also couldn't change what happened. Now she had to do some damage control. And if that meant to lie to pass the blame she would do it.  
  
And before she could really think about what to say the words came out. "Monica, I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. But on the other hand I'm glad that it's over. That was the worst month of my life."  
  
"Month? What. month?! Are you saying this was already going on for a month?" Monica felt totally numb. Could it be? She didn't know what to think anymore. But before she could grasp a coherent thought Rachel spoke again.  
  
"I know. And I felt so guilty the whole time. But I didn't know how to stop it. I think it was because of the hormones. Like Phoebe was during her forth month of pregnancy, when she was willing to sleep with anyone." Rachel couldn't believe how easy the lies came out of her mouth.  
  
"Hold on. So you and Chandler have been together for over a month? How could you two do that to me?"  
  
"I don't know how it happened. One day, you weren't here; I was in your apartment. Chandler kissed me and I don't know if it were the hormones or not, but I couldn't stop him. Before I knew we slept together and somehow it snowballed from there." Rachel cried. She hoped Monica would believe her and think that she really wasn't to blame and that she would eventually forgive her.  
  
"Oh my god. I can't believe it. I can't even look at you." With that Monica stormed out of the apartment and left a guilty looking Rachel behind.  
  
~*~  
  
Chandler returned to the now deserted apartment. He looked in the bedroom, the guest room and the bathroom, but Monica was nowhere in sight. He sat in a chair at the kitchen table and thought about what he should do next. After some minutes he stood and left the apartment. He had to look for Monica. It was making him crazy to just sit and wait.  
  
Little did he know that he missed Monica by just a few seconds. He turned around a corner as Monica made her way across the street and into her building. She hoped Chandler wouldn't be there when she got home. Because she didn't know what she would do if he was. At that moment she was so mad that her feelings of sadness were pushed back. But as soon as she stepped into her apartment it all came back. The feelings of betrayal, hurt and sadness. So she went to the couch and broke down in tears. She buried her head in the cushions and cried till her eyes burned.  
  
She was in this condition when Joey and Phoebe came laughing through the door. They both stopped dead in their tracks. Phoebe rushed over to Monica and put a comforting arm around her.  
  
"Monica, what happened?" Joey asked as he walked over to the couch.  
  
"Chandler. he.he." Monica tried to talk through her sniveling but she had a hiccup that made it impossible to get out a sentence.  
  
"Shush, its ok, take your time. Did something happen to Chandler?" Phoebe asked, worried that something awful had happened to Chandler.  
  
"What is it?" Joey asked crouching down next to Monica's head.  
  
"He.he cheated on me." Monica managed to say.  
  
Joey stood abruptly and took a step back. "What?!" he screeched. "No! That can't be!"  
  
"Joey! Now, Monica, what exactly happened? Why do you think he cheated on you?" Phoebe wanted to know.  
  
Monica sat up and grabbed a tissue from the side table next to the sofa. She dried her eyes and looked from Joey to Phoebe before speaking.  
  
"I came home today and saw him kissing Rachel."  
  
"Rachel? Our Rachel? Are you sure?" Joey interrupted. Phoebe just looked shocked at Monica.  
  
"Yes, Joey, I'm sure. After that I ran out. But Chandler followed me and said it wasn't as it seemed. But I didn't believe him and went to Rachel. She then confessed that she and Chandler had been sleeping together for the last month." Monica said with a breaking voice.  
  
Joey and Phoebe both stood there with open mouths. They couldn't believe what they were hearing.  
  
~*~  
  
Chandler had been walking through the park and saw that it was already getting dark. He had tried to call Rachel earlier but nobody had answered the phone. He thought it would be the best if he went home now. Maybe he could explain the situation to Monica so that she understood that nothing had really happened.  
  
Just as he entered his apartment Phoebe came out of the bedroom. She shot him an angry look. "You have nerves to come back." She said with clenched teeth.  
  
"What do you mean Phoebe? I didn't do anything."  
  
"Oh, so you didn't have an affair with Rachel? Y'know, you can throw your act. Rachel already told Monica all about the last month." Phoebe said.  
  
"Wha.What about last month." Chandler didn't understand what Phoebe was talking about but he didn't like what he heard.  
  
"Chandler, don't play dumb. Just admit that you slept with Rachel. Maybe Monica can forgive you. Although I doubt it." Phoebe got frustrated with the fact that Chandler lied to her face. The least he could do was confess and take the responsibility like Rachel. Denying just made it worse.  
  
"Phoebe, I don't know what you are talking about. Is Monica in there?" He pointed to the bedroom. "I want to talk to her."  
  
"Yes, she is in there. But I won't let you wake her up. She finally cried herself to sleep." Phoebe said while moving in front of the door.  
  
"That is my wife in there and I want to talk to her. Now get out of the way." Chandler tried to push his way past Phoebe.  
  
"No! You can't go in there!" Phoebe raised her voice.  
  
"It's ok Phoebe. I'm awake." Came Monica's whispered voice from behind her. "Chandler, I don't want to see you or speak to you ever again. What you did is inexcusable." Monica said to Chandler.  
  
"Monica, I don't know what you think to know. But you have to hear me out. It was just a kiss. And I didn't even kiss back!" Chandler panicked. He didn't know what was going on or why they thought he had slept with Rachel.  
  
"Ok, drop your act already. Rachel told me about you two and you are not talking yourself out of this. Now go, leave this apartment. I don't care where you go as long as I don't have to see you anymore." Monica said with an emotionless voice.  
  
"Monica." Chandler whispered with his head down.  
  
"No, Chandler! Get out! GET OUT!" Monica screamed. Chandler threw a last glance at Monica and Phoebe but saw nothing on their faces but contempt. So he turned around and left the apartment.  
  
  
  
TBC . . .  
  
  
  
Ok, that was chapter two. I know Rachel is a little out of character but that is necessary for the story. I'll try to post the next part sooner. Leaving a review might help me to hurry up. ;-) 


	3. Chapter 3

Hey, thanks for the reviews. Here is the next part. Sorry it took so long.  
  
DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.  
  
  
  
Chandler stood in the hallway between the apartments and leaned heavily against the wall. He didn't know what to think or what to do. He felt like he was living his most horrible nightmare. How could his live get so screwed up within a few hours? And to make things worse he didn't really know what happened.  
  
When he heard a sound from the apartment in front of him he made the decision to see if Joey could help him. Maybe he knew what was going on. So he went through the door. But Joey wasn't in the living room.  
  
"Joey, are you here?" he called in direction of the closed bedroom door.  
  
A moment later the door was harshly opened and an angry looking Joey came in sight. Chandler frowned at the look on his friends face.  
  
"Joey, can I talk to you?"  
  
"I don't think there is anything I want to hear from you." Joey said through gritted teeth.  
  
"But..." Chandler tried to say something. He was stopped by Joey.  
  
"No. I don't want to hear it. You knew I love Rachel and then you go and sleep with her. That is unforgivable. And that you hurt Mon with it just makes it worse." Joey said. "I mean Rachel is partly at fault too, but she is pregnant. You know how vulnerable pregnant women are." He rushed on. "You took advantage of her." He pointed at Chandler, who at this point stood with an open mouth in the kitchen area watching his friend pacing the living room.  
  
"But I didn't sleep with her!" Chandler yelled. "Damn it, why does everyone think I slept with Rachel?" Chandler asked.  
  
"Oh, come on, Chandler. If you cheat on your wife and it comes out, then be a man and take the responsibility for it." Joey said disgusted with his former best friend. He couldn't understand how Chandler could be so spineless.  
  
Chandler knew he wouldn't get anywhere with Joey, so he left.  
  
**********************  
  
When Chandler came back to the apartment the next day he saw Joey, Phoebe and Ross on the couch. But no sign of Monica. At the sound of the door the three turned their heads toward Chandler. By the looks on their faces Chandler knew they were still fuming with him. And the way Ross was glaring at him he thought it might be better not to go too far into the apartment.  
  
"Where is Monica?" Right after Chandler asked that question the bathroom door opened and Monica stepped into the living room. Monica stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Chandler. He started to approach her but stopped when she matched his step with a step back to get away from him. "Monica, please let us talk about this. This is just a big misunderstanding."  
  
"How can this be a misunderstanding? I know what I saw and Rachel already confessed. Why are you still denying it?" Monica challenged.  
  
"I'm not denying anything. I don't know what you think to know but it's wrong." Chandler was getting angry with Monica, with his so called friends and with the situation as a whole. "I don't know what Rachel told you, but obviously it was a lie!"  
  
"And why should Rachel tell such a story if it wasn't true?" Ross wanted to know. He got up from the couch and stood now behind Monica.  
  
"How should I know?!" Chandler screeched. "All I know is that it's not true!" Chandler spoke to Monica again. "I thought you would trust me. I can't believe you don't trust me!!"  
  
"Chandler, I think it's best if you go now." Monica said with a sad look on her face. "Take the things you need and go."  
  
"I can't believe it." Chandler shook his head. "What is with you Ross, do you want to hear what I have to say?"  
  
"I think it's all been said." Ross said and placed his hands on Monica's shoulders.  
  
"Joey? Pheebs?" Chandler asked his friends. But Joey only shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. And Phoebe didn't even look at him. "Ok, I know when I'm not wanted so I'll leave." Chandler threw his hands up in frustration. "God, I hope you're happy now, Monica. And if you find out the truth some day I want you to remember that I loved you with all my heart and that I had never done anything to hurt you." With that Chandler went out of the apartment.  
  
********************  
  
After Chandler left apartment 20 he stood on the sidewalk in front of Central Perk. He didn't know what he should do. He felt betrayed and hurt. And he didn't know where he should go now. So he just stood there for about ten minutes. Then he suddenly came to life and walked down the street. He knew that he couldn't stay in New York any longer. There were too many feelings and memories. His heartache was already almost too much to take. He had to clear the fog that had numbed his mind. And he knew a place where he could go. All he had to do before he could leave was to quit his job and to take all his money out of the bank.  
  
Three hours later he sat on a plane heading to Las Vegas.  
  
TBC...  
  
That's it for now. Sorry, that it's so short, but it's a good place to stop. Please review. I'll post the next part the day after tomorrow. It's almost done. 


	4. Chapter 4

DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine. Although I wished for Chandler as I blew out my birthday candles. I await the package any day now. lol.  
  
AN: Of course, Chandler went to his father. I played with the idea to let him become "Christine" and work for his father. lol. Ok, I'm kidding. :-D  
  
  
  
  
  
Monica couldn't get the look out of her head that Chandler had thrown to her right before he left. His eyes were full of sadness and hurt and a little anger. Had she done the right thing in believing Rachel? As the days went by the doubts got stronger with every passing minute. And now, a week after Chandler had left the apartment and apparently her life, she couldn't stand it any longer. She had to talk to Rachel. She took her phone and dialed the familiar number.  
  
"Rachel? Could you come over here? I have to talk to you."  
  
***************  
  
Rachel couldn't believe that Monica had called her. Ever since Monica had stormed out of Ross' and her apartment she hadn't talked to her. Ross had shown her how disappointed he was but couldn't ignore her since she carried his baby and lived with him in the same apartment. And Joey and Phoebe had stopped to overlook her two days ago. She had met them at Central Perk and had begged and pleaded. She hadn't let them go until they both spoke to her again.  
  
Right after Ross came home a week ago he had told her that Chandler had left. He said he hoped for good. Rachel couldn't help to feel a twinge of guilt going through her as she heard that. But she managed to suppress her conscience that time. But by now it really had gotten to her, that her lie had destroyed the marriage of her two friends.  
  
She knew that Monica probably wanted to talk about what had happened between her and Chandler. And Rachel knew she should tell Monica the truth. Maybe they could find Chandler and fix this mess. But Rachel wasn't ready to face her demons. She couldn't take back what she had done and now she had to live with the consequences. So she ignored her conscience once more and headed over to Monica's.  
  
***************  
  
Like every day during the last week Chandler sat in the room his father let him stay in. His thoughts were filled with Monica and what his life had become. He didn't bother to look up as the door opened and his father entered the poorly lighted room.  
  
"Son, you have to come out of this room already." He noticed the tray with the almost untouched food he brought in there earlier that day. "And you need to eat more. This isn't healthy."  
  
"I don't care for my health." Chandler said and turned away from his father's worried look.  
  
"Well, believe it or not, I care for it. So you're coming outside with me now and you'll tell me what happened in New York." After Chandler didn't show a sign of moving Charles/Helena walked over to him. "Ok, if I have to drag you out by your ears then I'll do that." He said and grabbed for Chandlers ear.  
  
"Dad!" Chandler shrieked as he struggled to his feet. "Ok, ok, I'm coming."  
  
"Then go. I'm right behind you." Charles couldn't stop the triumphantly grin on his face as he followed Chandler out of the room.  
  
They went through the living room and out to the terrace where Chandler sat down in one of the comfortable patio chairs. He let his look roam over the big pool and the wonderful garden which both seemed typical for a house in this part of Las Vegas.  
  
Charles watched Chandler as he looked around the garden. The last time he had seen Chandler was at his wedding and he couldn't believe that the man who beamed with joy not more then four month ago was the same man now sitting in front of him. His eyes looked almost broken and there was an unbelievingly deep sadness clouding them.  
  
"Chandler, please talk to me." Charles pulled his son out of his thoughts. "I think it may help if you talk about it. What happened in New York?"  
  
"Well, that's just it. I don't really know what happened." Chandler began. And then he tried to repeat the events of that fateful day over a week ago. After Chandler stopped with his story Charles didn't know what to think. He was shocked to hear that Monica wouldn't want to hear his side and just threw him out. He believed Chandler when he said he was faithful to Monica. The two of them talked for many hours. Charles tried to console Chandler and Chandler tried to find an answer to the questions bothering his mind.  
  
"And what are your plans for the future?" Charles asked later.  
  
"I don't know." Chandler said. "For now I'd like to stay just here. If you don't mind. I've enough money to live from for awhile."  
  
"Don't worry about money. You can stay here as long as you want to. God knows I owe you a lot to make up for what I put you through when you were younger." Charles told him while he looked at the ground.  
  
"Dad, you owe me nothing. But I'm really thankful that you let me stay here."  
  
**************  
  
When Rachel arrived at the apartment she once shared with Monica she hesitated. On the way over she had changed her mind several times. She wasn't sure what to do. Should she tell Monica the truth and soothe her conscience? Or should she go on with her lie? Both options held consequences Rachel wasn't able to calculate. Rachel knew one thing for sure. She needed more time to make a decision so she turned around, ready to leave. Right then the door behind her opened and Monica appeared in the hall with a trash bag in her hand.  
  
"Rachel? I was waiting for you. I already thought you wouldn't come." Monica said with a tired voice. And as Rachel turned to face her she saw that not only did Monica sound tired but she looked like she hadn't slept all week. Her eyes had dark circle around them and her hair was knotted and dull. It was Monica's appearance that gave Rachel the final push. She had to tell the truth.  
  
"You can go in. I just have to bring the trash away and then we can talk, ok?" Monica ushered Rachel into the kitchen and left.  
  
Just as Rachel sat down on the sofa Monica came back in. She joined her at the couch and looked at Rachel for a long time before she finally spoke.  
  
"Rachel, I know we aren't really on speaking terms right now. But I have to know what happened between you and Chandler. I want to know every little detail. It's driving me crazy not to know what you two did and how it started." Monica said. "And maybe we can work through this mess and start over. I'm not saying that it's going to be easy to forgive you. But I talked to Phoebe and she told me about some stuff she went through when she was pregnant." Monica continued. "I don't want to get into details. Let's just say Phoebe did some really crazy things." Monica managed a halfhearted smile.  
  
"Oh Monica. I'd love to start over." Rachel covered Monica's hands with her own. "But I'm not sure if you still want to do that after I explained to you what happened." Rachel said with a sigh. She buried her head in her hands and tried to gather her thoughts. Monica wanted to start over. That was just great. She wanted to forgive her and wanted her as a friend again. And that was despite the fact that she had "slept" with Chandler. She wanted to tell her the truth. But she also knew that if she told her the truth now, Monica would hate her forever and so would the others. She was contemplating her options, when Monica's voice pulled her out of her thoughts.  
  
"Rachel, please, tell me what happened. Please." Monica begged with pleading eyes. Rachel looked in Monica's face. And all she could think about was how much she loved her as a friend. She couldn't take back what she did. And if she would be honest now she knew it would upset Monica even more than she already was. So she did what she thought was the best for Monica.  
  
"Ok, it was on a Saturday last month. You weren't here. I came over to borrow a book and Chandler was here sitting on the couch." Rachel began slowly. "I don't really remember how it started. We were sitting on the couch together, talking, and the next thing I know, Chandler kissed me. At first I broke away, but he said he wanted me and I was so confused at that moment that I let him lead me to the bedroom." Rachel said with tears streaming down her cheeks. "And after that we just came together every now and then. It wasn't really anything planned. It just happened. I felt so bad for doing it but I couldn't stop it." Rachel explained before she continued with a barely audible voice. "In a way I'm glad you caught us."  
  
"Why are you glad I caught you?" Monica asked confused by that statement.  
  
Rachel lifted her head to look into Monica's tear-filled eyes "Because I felt so awful for what we did but I didn't know what to do."  
  
Monica nodded her head before she got a thoughtful look on her face. "When did you say was the first time? I can't think of a time I wasn't here last month."  
  
"Well, remember, it was the weekend where you went to your cousin in Boston. She had just given birth to her daughter and you wanted to visit her." Rachel reminded Monica.  
  
"Oh, yeah, you are right. That was five weeks ago." Monica said and Rachel nodded. Suddenly Monica straightened up on the couch as she remembered something. "But that can't be right!"  
  
TBC...  
  
Ok, that's it for now. If you've read this chapter (and I think you did, or else you wouldn't be reading this right now ;-) then please take the time to leave a review. Next part will be posted as soon as it's written. 


	5. Chapter 5

AN: Wow, this took a while. Lol. Sorry for that. But I was really busy. And now I'm just glad that I got something written again.  
  
Someone said in a review that they were all OOC. I know that. Although I don't think they are any more OOC than in any other fanfiction story. And I'm not as good of a writer to make it better. Or else I would write for the actual show and would have a lot more money than I have now. Lol. I will do my best to bring the characters closer to the originals. But that is gonna be really hard since this is a drama fic and Friends is comedy.  
  
I want to thank all of you who reviewed. This is for you.  
  
DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.  
  
**************  
  
Where we left off:  
  
"But that can't be right!" Monica said. "I now remember that weekend."  
  
FLASHBACK to Friday afternoon five weeks ago  
  
Monica was on the phone sitting at the kitchen table when Chandler entered the apartment. He walked over to her and gave her a quick kiss on the temple before he sat down on the chair next to her.  
  
"Ok, I'll see you then." Monica said into the phone and then turned it of. "Hey, sweetie. How was your doctors appointment?"  
  
Chandler grimaced. "It was alright. Who was that?" He pointed at the phone.  
  
"Oh, that was my cousin Jane. She gave birth yesterday." Monica informed him.  
  
"Is she the one who lives in Boston?"  
  
"Yeah, that's her. She asked if we want to come up there this weekend. You know, to see the baby and spend some time together. We haven't seen each other for over a year. So, what do you say?" Monica smiled slyly at Chandler. "And we two could spend some alone-time away from our friends."  
  
"I'd love that but I have this stupid meeting tomorrow. So I can't go. But you should go anyway. I think I can survive a weekend without my wife." Chandler said grinning. "And the doctor said we can't have 'alone-time' for at least three days. The rash has gotten pretty painful." Chandler grimaced as he shifted on the chair.  
  
"Oh, my poor baby." Monica stroked his cheek to console him.  
  
"Y'know, maybe it's for the best that you are not going to be here this weekend. That way my celibacy isn't so hard to endure. Plus, I could spend some time with Joey."  
  
"You mean, you'll watch TV, eat Pizza and won't go outside the whole weekend." Monica asked with a smirk on her face.  
  
"Exactly." Chandler beamed. "That's gonna be the best weekend EVER!"  
  
"So weekends you spend with me are boring?" Monica tried to keep a serious face as she saw the panic on Chandlers face.  
  
"What?! No! No, that's not what I meant. It's just, Joey and I...uh...y'know, we..." Chandler stammered.  
  
"Honey, it's ok. I was just teasing." Monica stopped his rambling. "I know what you mean. And I hope you have a great weekend with Joey. Although I'm gonna miss you in Boston."  
  
"Aww, I'll miss you too." Chandler leant over the table and gave Monica a sweet and slow kiss.  
  
**************  
  
Back To The Present...  
  
Rachel felt fear creeping into her heart as she watched Monica. She just sat there deep in thought and hadn't said anything during the past minutes. Rachel couldn't take the silence any longer.  
  
"What are you thinking about, Mon?" she wondered.  
  
"Huh?" Monica was startled out of her reflection. "Oh, I just remembered the weekend you are talking about." Monica looked intently at Rachel. Monica now had a disturbing suspicion. "So, that was the weekend where you and Chandler slept together for the first time?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Please tell me more. I need to know." Monica said to Rachel. She didn't want to jump to conclusions. But how was it possible that they slept together when Chandler had a rash. It wasn't the first time he had something like that. And she knew how painful they were for him. Maybe it had healed a little before they had sex together. Maybe they hadn't done anything before Sunday evening.  
  
"Ok, it was Saturday morning and as I said, I came over here to borrow a..." Rachel trailed off as she saw the paleness of Monica's face. "What? What's the problem, Monica?"  
  
Monica was stunned. She didn't know what to say. "No..." she whispered. She felt the room spin circles around her. And then it all went black...  
  
**************  
  
As Monica came to she found herself lying on her couch. She heard a low mumbling coming from the kitchen. Monica sat up and looked over to the kitchen table where she saw the rest of the gang. Joey saw her sitting up and rushed over to her and crouched down next to the sofa.  
  
"Monica, are you all right?"  
  
"I think so. What happened?" She felt very lightheaded. So she shook her head to clear it from the confusing fog.  
  
"You were talking to Rachel when you suddenly passed out." Joey informed her gesturing towards Rachel who still stood in the kitchen. She didn't want to go near Monica. She didn't know why Monica had lost her consciousness back then. But she had a very bad feeling in her stomach.  
  
Monica looked from Joey to Ross who was standing behind the couch. Her gaze went past Ross and focused on Rachel. She gasped as she remembered what she discovered before her black out. She jumped up from the couch.  
  
"You...you were lying! All the time you were lying to me." she accused Rachel. "It's impossible that Chandler slept with you on the Saturday I went to Boston." Monica went over so she was standing right in front of Rachel.  
  
"Uh...Well, Monica...please..." Rachel stammered only to be interrupted by Monica.  
  
"Oh my god! How could you?! It's all your fault!" Monica screamed. "Oh god. And Chandler...God knows where he is." With that Monica sunk to the floor. "What have I done?" she whispered. Phoebe slid out of the chair she was sitting on and wrapped her arms around Monica.  
  
"What are you talking about, Monica?" Phoebe asked. "What did Chandler do now?"  
  
"Nothing!" Monica squealed pushing Phoebe away. "He did nothing! Not now and not then! Don't you understand? He told the truth and I didn't listen." Monica was now sobbing.  
  
Rachel had lost all color in her face and was now leaning against the door. She didn't really know how Monica knew that she had lied. But she knew that Monica was sure about it. Rachel didn't know what to do now, so she opened the door and slipped out of the apartment.  
  
Ross and Joey came from the living room and were now standing beside Monica and Phoebe.  
  
"What do you mean, he told the truth. I thought Rachel..." Ross started, concern showing on his face.  
  
"Right! Rachel..." Monica searched the room for Rachel but noticed that she wasn't there anymore. "She lied. From the beginning she fed me nothing but lies. But I caught her. And now...now my life is ruined. My marriage is ruined." Monica began crying again. "I drove my husband...my best friend away. For nothing. He hates me. I hate myself." Monica stood up and swayed a little on her shaking legs. But she pushed Ross' steadying hands away. Then she turned around and sneaked with hanging head back into her bedroom and locked the door.  
  
Phoebe, Joey and Ross looked at each other. Not quite sure what to think or what happened there a minute before. Ross was the first to move. He took his jacket from the back of the couch and left.  
  
**************  
  
Ross made his way over to his and Rachel's apartment hoping she would be there. He had to talk to her. Right now. He opened his door and immediately saw a crying Rachel sitting on the couch. She looked up to check who entered the apartment and buried her face in her hands again as she saw Ross.  
  
"Ok, Rachel, what the hell happened there? What was Monica talking about?" Ross demanded to know as he sat down beside her on the couch.  
  
"I...I made a horrible mistake." Rachel whispered with her hands still covering her face.  
  
"Yeah, but we already knew that. You slept with Chandler and..."  
  
"No!" Rachel screamed. "Don't you get it?! I didn't sleep with Chandler!"  
  
"So, it's true. You were lying." Ross stated calm. "Why would you do that! What possessed you to lie about something like that?"  
  
"Monica saw me kissing Chandler and I didn't want to lose you all. So the lies just came out. And when I wanted to tell Monica the truth Chandler was already gone. And I thought if I'd tell the truth now it would only hurt Monica more. I just couldn't do it." Rachel choked out.  
  
"I...Well, I don't know what to say to that. I don't...I can't even look at you right now." Ross stuttered.  
  
"I didn't intend for all of this to happen." Rachel mumbled.  
  
"And I really want to believe that. But I can't. I feel like I don't even know you anymore. I...I'm so mad." Ross paused. "I don't know what to do, with the baby coming in a couple of month and all. But I think right now it'd be best if you'd move out."  
  
Rachel's head shot up at this. Shock and fear lining her eyes. "You don't mean that."  
  
"But I do. What you did was...cruel. And that you did it to two of your best friends just makes it worse."  
  
"I'm so, so sorry." Rachel sobbed.  
  
"Well, to little to late. Do you even know how bad you hurt Monica? And Chandler? I don't even know where he is and I can't imagine how he must feel." Ross said now with rage building. "Did you just for one second think about what you'd do to him? God, we are all at fault. Why didn't we give him a chance to tell his side?" Ross said to himself.  
  
"Oh god, I'm so sorry." Rachel said again.  
  
Ross stood from the couch and looked at Rachel with disgust written on his face. "I have to work till 5pm tomorrow. I hope you are gone when I get back." With that he went into his bedroom and left a weeping Rachel behind.  
  
TBC...  
  
Please leave a review. Any *constructive* comments are welcome. 


	6. Chapter 6

AN: It's me! How fast did I get this written? Wow, sometimes I amaze myself. And just to annoy this Penny person. Maybe you all should insult me personally so I get the next chapter out as soon as this. Just kidding. That I got this done so fast was just because of your great support. Thanks for all the great reviews. Well, all but one. lol. You guys are the best. You motivated me to continue, so keep them coming.  
  
DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.  
  
*************  
  
The next day Monica emerged with red eyes and tearstained cheeks from her bedroom. She was glad to find the apartment empty. She didn't want to be bothered with the pitying looks of the others. She went into the bathroom and took a long, hot shower. The vitalizing water pulled her out of the trancelike state that she had been in since the life changing discovery the day before. One thing was absolutely clear to her now. She had to try and find Chandler. At least to apologize. And maybe they could even work out the problems they had.  
  
After the shower Monica decided her best shot at finding Chandler were his parents. So she pulled her address book out of her purse and searched for Nora Bing's number. When she found it she looked at the paper in front of her for some time. Trying to find the much needed courage necessary to call. Finally she grabbed the phone and dialed the number of Nora's cell phone. After the tenth ring someone picked up.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Nora, it's me. Monica. Do you by any chance know where Chandler is?" Monica asked her mother-in-law hopefully.  
  
"My god, Monica. You have some nerves to call here asking for Chandler." Nora said. Monica was shocked by the cold demeanor of her mother-in-law. But she was relieved to hear that Chandler had evidently talked to his mother. She just wanted to try again as Nora continued. "All I can tell you is that he doesn't want to talk to you. And I'm not going to tell you where he is."  
  
"Please, Nora. It's really important that I talk to him." Monica pleaded.  
  
"Oh, I didn't know that it was 'really' important." Nora replied sarcastically. "That changes every thing."  
  
'Wow, now I know where Chandler gets his sarcasm from.' Monica thought.  
  
"Can you at least tell me if he's all right?" Monica asked.  
  
"No, he's not all right. But he is alive and I think with time he'll get better." Nora sighed. "Y'know, I really liked you Monica. But you hurt Chandler pretty bad. And I think it would be best if you don't contact me again." Before Monica could say something Nora cut her of by turning her phone off.  
  
Monica put her head down on the kitchen table. Tears dropping unchecked down on the wood. She knew she deserved it. But it hurt nonetheless that Chandler didn't want to talk to her. After the call all her determination was gone. He didn't want to see her and maybe she should respect that. But if that was the right thing to do, why did it hurt so bad?  
  
*************  
  
Las Vegas 8 weeks later  
  
Chandler was sitting in the Las Vegas evening sun on his fathers patio. He was tipping a mile a minute on the laptop in front of him. Suddenly he sat up and yelled "Finished". Startling his father who was dozing in the chair across from him out of his slumber.  
  
"What? What? What happened?" Charles asked looking around hectically.  
  
"Nothing happened." Chandler had to laugh at the confused and sleepy look on Charles' face. "I just said that I'm finished. I'm done."  
  
"Wow, that is amazing. I'd have never thought that you could get it done this fast." Charles said with admiration visible on his face. "I'm really proud of you."  
  
"Aww, thanks dad. You're becoming a big softy now that you're approaching the big 6-0." Chandler said grinning. He knew exactly how his father would react to the mentioning of his 60th birthday.  
  
"Hush, don't talk about that." Charles hissed looking around to see if anybody had heard it.  
  
Chandler shook his head. Sometimes his father was just too much. It was incredible how well the two of them got along now. And it made Chandler sad thinking about the time they had wasted before they got this close. That was one of the good things resulting from his break with his wife and friends and his leaving from New York.  
  
The other good thing was something that he loved more and more these days. He had finally followed his urge and started to write a book.  
  
It was about a week after Chandler had told his father was happened back in New York that the two of them had a long conversation about Chandlers dreams and what he wanted to do with his life. After that Charles bought his son the laptop and encouraged him to just start writing. He said it would be good for Chandler. It would be a good way to keep his thoughts off of the past and help him to move on.  
  
Chandler had really nothing to say against that. So he started to write his very first book. And after some days he realized that it not only kept him from thinking about Monica it also made him happy. And the progression of the book went surprisingly well. Maybe the writing talent came with the genes.  
  
So now, more or less six weeks of constant writing and a minimal amount of sleep later the book was ready.  
  
"Well, what do I do now that the book is ready?" Chandler asked, talking more to himself than with his father.  
  
"Ok, now please don't get angry with me. But I told Nora that you were writing a book and she said she would ask her agent if he could pull some strings." Charles explained, fearing that Chandler would get mad. Chandler didn't want anyone but his dad to know that he was writing. And Charles knew it was hard for Chandler to accept help. He wanted to do everything alone. 'Maybe that's because he's an only child.' Charles mused.  
  
"Hmm, I don't kn..." Chandler began only to be cut of by Charles.  
  
"I have his number. All I want you to do is call him. That is not a guarantee for anything. But you have to get your foot in somehow." Charles argued.  
  
"Ok, if you think I should do it I'll call him." Chandler gave in.  
  
"That's all I'm asking for."  
  
*************  
  
Chandler called the agent and after a long talk about the small chances of becoming a published writer he agreed to pass Chandlers book on to one of his friends in a publishing house. They all loved his book, so now he had a agent, the same as his mother, and a contract with a publisher to print his book. All he had to do now was sign it.  
  
"Chandler, this is Mr. Beaumont." Charles introduced the man to his son. "He's a lawyer specialized to represent authors, actors and other artists. He has a great reputation."  
  
"Mr. Beaumont." Chandler said and reached out to shake his hand.  
  
"Please, call me Victor. After all I'm not that much older than you." Victor replied.  
  
"Ok, Victor. Why don't we take this to the living room?" Chandler said while leading the man to the couch. "Can I get you something to drink?" He asked once Victor took a seat.  
  
"A glass of water would be nice." Victor sighed. "This heat is killing me. Why did I have to move to Las Vegas." He laughed. Chandler liked the man already. He was the exact opposite of what Chandler had imagined. He seemed nice and the laugh wrinkles around his eyes made him look like a sympathetic guy.  
  
"I get it." Charles said and went to the kitchen. After a few minutes he returned with a tray containing two glasses and a carafe filled with iced water. He placed the tray on the coffee table and turned around to leave. "I'm out on the terrace if anybody needs me."  
  
"So, I read the contract your father faxed over to me." Victor began while Chandler poured the water into the two glasses and offered one to Victor. "It's pretty much a standard contract. Which is normal considering that this is your first book. There shouldn't be any problems." He continued. "But there is something else I wanted to talk to you about."  
  
"Ok. What is it?" Chandler asked.  
  
"Well, as I see it, you are married. But you and your wife don't live together anymore. Is that correct?" Victor couldn't help but notice that Chandler tensed up and lost the color in his face.  
  
"Yeah, that is right." Chandler replied in a small voice. He hadn't really thought about Monica during the last weeks. He had more or less ignored the issue and drawn himself in writing. But now that Victor reminded him the pain came back with full force. He grabbed his glass from the coffee table and took a long gulp.  
  
"I see that this is a painful subject for you. But I need to know what your future plans are in that matter." Victor said in a caring tone. "The thing is if you sign the contract now and the book is successful she would have the right for a half of the money."  
  
"So, you are saying I should get a divorce?"  
  
"Unless you can see the two of you getting back together again or you want to give her half of the money, I don't see any other option." Victor pointed out.  
  
Chandler stared at the condensing water running down his glass and landing on his hand. How should he make such a decision?  
  
*************  
  
New York A few days later  
  
Phoebe and Monica came through the door of their apartment building. After the debacle that ended with Chandler leaving and Rachel moving back to her mother, Phoebe moved in with Monica. It was only temporary till Monica felt better about losing Chandler. But it didn't look like that would happen anytime soon.  
  
"Thanks again for going shopping with me." Phoebe said to Monica. "I know I wouldn't have found this dress if you hadn't been there."  
  
"Aww, Phoebe. You are just saying that because you are glad that you got me out of the apartment." Monica countered.  
  
"Yeah, well. It's not healthy to just leave it for work. Your aura is all gray. But at least it is a lighter shade after this day out." Phoebe said. "This should really teach you to go out more often."  
  
Monica gave her a small, bitter smile. "I really don't feel like going out nowadays."  
  
"I understand that. And I'm not pressuring you. It's just that you have to get over it one day and move on." Phoebe eyed Monica while she got the mail out of the mail box. She knew this was a touchy topic. But they had to talk about it sometimes.  
  
"You may be right, Phoebe. But that day is not today." Monica said on the way up the stairs. "Or any day for the next few years." She added for herself.  
  
"Did you say something?" Phoebe asked.  
  
"No, nothing." Monica replied fast pushing the door open. She put her purse and keys down on the counter next to the door and sat down at the kitchen table to leaf through the mail. Phoebe went to her room to put her dress away.  
  
"Pheebs, do we know a Mr. Beaumont?" Monica shouted in the direction of Phoebes bedroom.  
  
"Not that I knew of, why?" Phoebe asked coming out of her room.  
  
"Well, he send me a letter. It's from Vegas." Monica said slowly.  
  
"You won't know till you open it." Phoebe advised.  
  
"That's a great idea." Monica responded rolling her eyes.  
  
"Hey! I saw that eye rolling. Now open it."  
  
Monica took the thick brown envelope in her hand and ripped the side open. She pulled some official looking documents out. "What is this?" She mumbled and started to read the first sheet.  
  
Phoebe watched in horror as Monica stumbled out of her chair, knocking it over in the progress. Tears already forming in her eyes. She shot a miserable look at Phoebe, threw the papers on the ground and ran into her room. Slamming the door shut pretty hard.  
  
"What the hell." Phoebe exclaimed and bend down to get the letter from the ground. Just as she wanted to look it over the door opened and Joey and Ross stormed in.  
  
"What happened? What was that noise?" They asked both at the same time.  
  
"Monica knocked her chair over and slammed her door." Phoebe informed them.  
  
"What? Why did she slam her door?" Ross asked concerned for his sister. Since Rachel destroyed his sisters marriage he was a lot more protective about her.  
  
"I don't know..." Phoebe said, still trying to figure out what the document was about. "She opened her mail and then she just snapped...I don't understand this." She gestured to the papers. "Ross, do you know what this is?" She passed the text over to him.  
  
Ross sat down at the kitchen table and started to read the first page. After a few seconds he knew what it was. He looked with a shocked face at Phoebe and Joey.  
  
"What? What is it?" Phoebe was getting nervous from the not knowing.  
  
"These are divorce papers." Ross explained.  
  
"Who are you getting divorced from? I didn't know you married again." Joey said.  
  
"Joey, they aren't for me. They are for Monica. Chandler. He is filing for a divorce." Ross said sadly.  
  
"Ohh." A look of understanding crossed Joeys face. Then he turned to Monica's bedroom. "Poor Monica. No wonder she slammed the door then."  
  
"Right, Joey." Phoebe said rolling her eyes. "I'll go looking how she is doing."  
  
Phoebe just reached the bedroom door as it flew open. She jumped back in surprise. Monica came out into the living room area looking rather defiant.  
  
"I'm not going to sign that." She exclaimed. "If he wants a divorce he has to come here to get it." She added fiercely. With that she went over to Ross, took the papers from him and tore them in four even pieces.  
  
*************  
  
Las Vegas A week later  
  
"Hey, Chandler." Victor voice came through phone. "We have a problem."  
  
"What problem?"  
  
"Your wife hasn't sent back the divorce papers yet. And the people from the publishing house are getting impatient. They want to start printing and they said you have to sign the contract at the latest by the end of the week." Victor clarified.  
  
"What do we do now?" Chandler wanted to know.  
  
"Well, you have two options. A, you can wait and hope that your wife sends the papers till then. Or B, you can go to New York and get the signature." Victor said. "I would suggest the second way."  
  
"What!" Chandler screeched. "I can't go to New York. Then I'd have to see her. I don't think I'm ready for that. No, there has to be another way. You are my lawyer. Think of something. That is you job. I'm paying you to spare me from things like this." Chandler rambled on.  
  
"Ok, ok." Victor interrupted. "I could give you a third option. But you are not going to like it."  
  
"Just tell me." Chandler demanded.  
  
"You could stay married and give her half of the money."  
  
Chandler didn't know how to reply to that. He didn't really care about the money. But he couldn't stand the thought that Monica got the half of it. He could practically see her and his former friends laugh about him when they opened the envelope with the check. Deep down he knew that they wouldn't act that way. But in his mind he saw them dancing around with money flying everywhere laughing at his stupidity. He shook his head to get rid of the image.  
  
"Ok. I'll go to New York. You get the signed divorce papers and the contract the day after tomorrow."  
  
TBC...  
  
*************  
  
AN: As you can probably tell I know nothing about publishing a book or the US laws concerning divorce. But this is fiction and if anything went to fast that's just cause I wanted it to. And it had to fit the time line. lol. Thanks for reading. Please leave a review. 


	7. Chapter 7

AN: Thanks again for all the nice reviews. Reviews are my fuel. As a reward comes here the next part. I made someone laugh at the last chapter. Yay me! lol. But I can guarantee you that there is nothing to laugh at in this chapter. This is a drama fic, so here comes the drama. ;-) And I'm sorry that it's so short but this piece was really hard to write and I'm just glad that I could put it behind me now.  
  
DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.  
  
*************  
  
New York Later that day  
  
Chandler sat in a cab on the way from the airport to his old apartment building and his old life. His stomach was churning and he felt a light sweat form on his forehead. His anxiety was rising as he recognized his old neighborhood. And then suddenly he arrived at his destination. The cab driver stopped and turned around, his look questioning Chandler.  
  
"Could you wait a few minutes. It could be possible that I will go to the hotel first." Chandler told the cabbie.  
  
"Sure. But y'know, the clock keeps running, buddy."  
  
"That's ok." Chandler mumbled while climbing out of the car.  
  
He cast around for anyone familiar and took a small step away from the vehicle. It was just his luck that Phoebe came out of the door in front of him right then. She stopped dead in her tracks when she identified the man standing a few feet away. Her mouth fell open and her eyes grew big. But before she could say anything Chandler dove back into the cap and told the driver to beat the traffic.  
  
Phoebe stood there. Maybe for some seconds, maybe for an eternity. And when she finally was able to think she didn't know if she had really just seen Chandler or if it was a trick played by her imagination. One thing was sure. She wouldn't tell Monica about her nearly encounter. If Chandler came back Monica would see him then. And if Chandler never came back, what would be the point in distressing Monica with this information.  
  
Chandler on the other hand sat in the cab, not sure about anything anymore. If seeing Phoebe for this short time shook him up so much he didn't want to think about his possible meeting with Monica. Phoebe had looked more shocked than mad. So maybe Monica wouldn't be angry either. When Victor advised him to get a divorce he had thought about it back and forth. He didn't know if he could ever get back together with Monica. For the possibility of that happening his pain was still to fresh, the hurt to deep.  
  
All he wanted to do right then was to get to the hotel and go to sleep. He didn't want to think about Monica any longer. But he knew that was wishful thinking and that he wouldn't get her out of his head. Maybe the divorce could give him some closure.  
  
*************  
  
New York The next morning  
  
Chandler stood in front of the apartment door with the golden No. 20. He hadn't slept at all the previous night, so he'd used the time to work up his confidence for this meeting. And now he was almost sure that he could do it.  
  
He knocked.  
  
Seconds later he heard a chair scraping over the floor and steps nearing the door. His heart raced and he held his breath as the door opened.  
  
"Chandler." Monica gasped when she saw him standing in front of her. Before she could say anything else he pushed his way into the apartment.  
  
"Monica, I need to talk to you." He said harsher then he had planed.  
  
Monica winced at his tone but closed the door softly and turned around to look at him.  
  
"What are you doing here? I thought I would never see you again." Monica said quietly.  
  
"I know that you never wanted to see me again." He said bitterly. "But why didn't you just send the divorce papers back then?"  
  
"What?...No, I didn't mean it like that. I'm glad to see you again." Monica rambled on. "I missed you." She added quietly.  
  
"But I thought..."  
  
"I know what I said back then. But you have no idea how sorry I am." Monica cut him off. "If I had known then what I know now I swear I..."  
  
"What do you mean? What do you know now?" It was Chandlers turn to interrupt her.  
  
"It was Rachel. She lied to all of us. I don't really understand why she did it, though." Monica cast a short glance at Chandler but returned her look to her feet as soon as she met his eyes. "She told me that you had a month long affair with her. And I was so confused after I caught you two kissing that I believed her. I mean, why shouldn't I. She was supposed to be my best friend." Monica went on, the tears she had already shed over the betrayal and the loss of Chandler once again falling down her face. Chandler was flabbergasted. At least now it all made some sense.  
  
"Well, I was your husband and I thought I was your friend too. Yet you didn't even let me explain. Oh Mon...You have no idea how bad you hurt me that day." Chandler sighed as he pulled a chair out and sat down at the kitchen table. "One moment Rachel kisses me and the next moment my whole life is shred into little pieces. No wife, no friends, no place to stay..." Monica rushed over to where he was sitting and crouched down next to him.  
  
"I know. And I'm so, so sorry, sweetie." Monica felt Chandler tense at the term of endearment she used but chose to ignore it. "But you have to believe me when I say that it wasn't my intention to hurt you. I love you so much. You have to know that I always loved you and that I'll always loving you."  
  
"No!" Chandler yelled, jumping out of the chair nearly knocking it and the squatting Monica over in the progress. "No, I don't believe you. I can't believe you. You want to know why?" He asked but rushed on without giving her a chance to answer. "Because I saw it in your eyes that day. You hated me! Right then you didn't love me." He was pacing through the living room while Monica watched speechless from the kitchen as he carried on. "And who knows, maybe you didn't love me before that day either." Chandler contemplated. "I mean, how often did I have to hear from Rachel and Phoebe that I wasn't good enough for you, that you had just settled for me. And I never.never believed them." Chandler stopped in front of the TV seemingly deep in thought. "I was so stupid." Chandler said quietly to himself before he turned his head and looked directly in Monica's eyes. "But I paid the price for that." He ended his ranting bitterly.  
  
Monica gulped heavily. She had known that she had hurt Chandler with her actions but she never even imagined the proportions of the pain she saw in his eyes at that moment.  
  
"What do you want me to do, Chandler?" She asked with a barely audible voice. "I..."  
  
"I want you to sign the divorce papers." He said emotionless throwing the documents onto the coffee table.  
  
"But I love you. If you believe me or not doesn't change my feelings for you. I don't want to divorce you!" Monica dismissed his demand. She knew that she wouldn't see him again after they got divorced and she couldn't live with the thought of never seeing Chandler again. She had to prove it to him that she really loved him. But before she could start to convince him he broke down completely.  
  
"Why are you torturing me like this?" He sobbed not bothering to stop the tears any longer. He didn't want her to see him like this but he just couldn't stand it any longer. "Isn't it enough that you destroyed me? Do you have to see the damage with your own eyes. Is that why you wouldn't send back the papers? So that I would have to come here? Well, you've won. I'm here and you've seen me at my lowest point now. Please, please let me find some peace."  
  
Monica was shocked to her very core. She had never really seen Chandler cry and now here he was, a total wreck. And the worst was, it was her fault. She now saw that she had broken an important pillar supporting marriage, love and friendship. Trust. And with that she had broken Chandler too. And his love for her. She knew now that she had to let him go. She couldn't stand the thought of seeing Chandler like that a second longer. She loved him too much to do that to him. Chandler observed with watery eyes as Monica went to the coffee table. She took the papers and brought them to the kitchen table grabbing the phone pen on the way there. She spread the three identical documents out in front of her and searched for the line where she had to sign them. After she found it she looked up at Chandler who stood still rooted to his spot in the living room, trying to suppress his hiccups. Then she signed them.  
  
TBC...  
  
*************  
  
AN: That's it for now. As I said this was really hard to write. So please leave a review and tell me how it was. The next part will be up soon. Maybe even sooner, but that lies in your hands. *hint - hint* 


	8. Chapter 8

Thanks for the reviews. Here is the next part. This chapter concentrates a little on Joey. Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine. (Do I have to say that every chapter? Shouldn't it be enough if I say it at the beginning of a story? Cause it hurts every time I have to write it. ;-) But whatever.)

***************************************

Joey pulled his coat tighter around his body, trying to keep the cold November wind from freezing him to dead. He was standing at the train station waiting for his ride out of Queens. He was just getting back from his weekly family gathering. Like every week there was plenty of food and the freshest gossip going around.

Joey enjoyed this steady ritual. It was his chance to get away from the shattered group of friends. Since that fateful day twelve weeks ago it was almost unbearable for Joey to be around them for too long. There was just to much sorrow and regret floating around when they got together. He himself fought a constant battle with his conscience. He felt extremely guilty for the way he had treated Chandler.

Now in the clear light that time had created he realized that Chandler had tried to talk to him about what was going on. But he hadn't even given his friend a chance to explain himself. Instead he had let his own pride get the better of him. He had loved Rachel back then and the idea of Chandler sleeping with her was too much to stand. It had been so easy to jump to conclusions and believe Rachel's side of the story blindly.

And now they all had to live with the consequences. For him and the others that might mean never seeing their friend again. And as it looked like, for Monica it meant that she would have to divorce the love of her live.

Joey had been shocked when the papers arrived less than a week ago. Deep within his heart he still thought that Chandler would come back and that all would be like it had always been. But slowly he realized that the possibility of that happening was near to nonexistent.

Chandler wanted a divorce. That had to mean that he wasn't planning to come back. And Rachel still lived with her mother upstate. The only contact she had to the remaining group was through Ross. He visited her a couple of times to talk about their situation and now the two of them went to a Lamaze class once a week.

An hour later Joey climbed up the stairs to his apartment. His nose was painfully thawing, getting the warmth back that was sucked out of his whole body by the biting wind he had to struggle with on the way from the station to his building.

He started to unlock his door when he decided to make sure Monica was ok. He hadn't seen her for a few days. He knocked lightly on the green wood before opening the door slowly. Monica was always moody these days so Joey became very tentative around her. Always checking if she was in a good frame of mind or if she would bite his head off for just crossing her line of view.

But this time it was quite clear how she was feeling, because she was sitting at the kitchen table with her head on her arms. Her shoulders were heaving with the quite sobbing sounds she was making. Joey watched her for a few minutes, completely frozen. After all this times that he had seen her in such a state, he still didn't know how to react. And he hadn't seen her crying this bad for some weeks now.

Finally he snapped out of his thoughts and went over to her.

"Mon? Monica?" When she didn't seem to be aware of his presence he touched her shoulder. But she just jumped at the contact and wept louder.

"Monica?!" Joey was getting worried now so he started to shake her. "Monica, what's going on? Did something happen?!"

Monica lifted her head and cast a glance at Joey. He was shocked by what he saw in her eyes. It was nothing but an absolute and total defeat in them. Even after Chandlers disappearance a tiny spark of hope could at least be discovered in them.

Before Joey could find his voice Monica threw herself into his arms. Joey just stood there beside the table, rocking Monica back and forth, soothing her hair with one hand. The other one was rubbing her back.

They stayed like that for some time and when Monica suddenly spoke Joey got startled because he had been lost in the possibilities and scenarios his mind had formed.

"Chandler was here." Monica broke the silence.

After hearing that Joey felt a rush of happiness bolt through him. He wanted so badly to see his friend again and apologize. Maybe trying to mend there friendship. But his rising smile dropped instantly when he realized that Monica's state could only mean that Chandler wasn't back to see them or to stay. Joey pulled back from the hug and then stood a few feet in front of Monica.

"What did he say?" Was all Joey could get himself to ask after a few minutes of contemplating.

"Oh Joey!" Monica wailed. "You…you have no idea how bad I hurt…hurt Chandler back then." Monica was trying to suppress the oncoming hiccup. "He thinks I wanted to torture him by not signing the divorce papers."

"Why would he think that?"

"He believes that I wanted him to come back here so I could see his…his defeat." Monica sobbed.

"Oh no." Joey cried out. "And what did you say?"

"I didn't know what to say. You should have seen him. He broke down totally. He was crying, Joey! I have never really seen him cry." Monica whispered the last part. "I had to let him go. I had to sign the papers and let him start a new life. I just had to!" Monica was now getting close to hysterics. She sat on the chair sobbing and shaking terribly. Joey slowly went over to her and pulled her again in his arms. He just couldn't believe how it had come to this. Monica and Chandler were meant to stay together forever. But now he was more than sure that he and the others wouldn't see Chandler again. And that thought made him sad. Although, he couldn't blame Chandler. He would've reacted the same way if the roles had been reversed.

"What happened after you signed the papers?" Joey asked after Monica had calmed down a little. He still didn't want to believe that he had lost his friend permanently.

Monica looked up at Joey, tears still filling her eyes. "He said 'Thank you' and he wished me a happy life. And he meant it. I hurt him so much and still he wants the best for me. Can you believe that?" Monica asked rhetorically.

"Do you think he will ever come back?" Joey questioned. He had to know what Monica thought. If someone knew now if there was a chance for Chandler to come back it was Monica. And Joey wanted desperately to hold out hope to see his friend again after some time. Monica looked up at Joey and looked into his dark eyes. And for the first time she understood that she wasn't the only one hurting over Chandler's leaving. She saw the grief in Joeys eyes and that made it just harder to say the next sentence. But she had to be realistic to give him and her a chance to move on.

"No, Joey. I don't think we will see him again."

TBC…

**************************

I know it is short, but it was a good place to stop. And I already started with the next part. Maybe I can post it by the end of the week. But as always I need your support, so please review. I swear it doesn't hurt, I have done it myself a few times. ;-)


	9. Chapter 9

Here is the next part. I know it took a little longer but I gave my best. ;-) Thanks again for the nice reviews. I love them.

This part concentrates a little on Ross and Rachel, so you won't know if Chandler and Monica come back together. I have to keep you hanging a little. lol. Now have fun reading and please tell me how you think about it.

DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine. (Almost forgot this little thing. *g*)

**************

It was the first week in the new year and Chandler was once again sitting on a plane with New York City as the destination. It was more than six weeks ago that his divorce got finalized. It had made Victor a very happy man. But what else could you expect from a lawyer. Chandler on the other hand wasn't happy at all. He still had to process all the events started by kiss four and a half month ago.

So much had happened in such a short time that Chandler hadn't really had a chance to sort through his feelings. He had just ignored them and now it was much harder to overcome his fears of being hurt again. So he just stayed at home, where he knew he would be safe. Well, his new home anyway. Because how many bad memories about New York he may have now, he still considered it his real home. He realized, especially during the last holiday season, he missed New York. With its surprising blizzards, power blackouts and grumpy people shoving along the sidewalks. As nice as Las Vegas was with all the happy people and the constantly good weather, it wasn't the right thing for Chandler.

That didn't mean that Chandler was happy about going on this trip. But his publisher wouldn't take no for an answer. His book was published a month ago. Just in time for the Christmas rush. And it went good so far. The critics loved it and Chandler was celebrated as the most promising new author on the market. And they wanted him to participate in a book signing during the opening of a big bookstore in New York.

So now he was on his way back to the city where he lost the one great love and all of his friends. The one good thing about that trip was that Chandler could get his father off his back. Charles was always trying to get his son out of the house. Not in a bad way though. He just wanted his son to meet new people. Chandler remembered a discussion he and his father had had at New Years Eve.

~*~

_New Years Eve_

_"Chandler, why don't you come with me on the strip? A little partying would do you good. You have to leave this house some time and meet new people."_

_"Why? Why do I have to meet new people?" Chandler asked feeling defensive. "I'm completely happy with my life the way it is."_

_"Don't think I'm stupid. I know you are not happy." Charles replied calmly. "I know that you got hurt pretty bad from your old friends. But that doesn't mean that everyone out there whom you will get to know will hurt you."_

_Charles knew that he had hit the right point when he saw Chandler's face harden. But he didn't let his son say anything in return. He continued right as Chandler opened his mouth._

_"And I'm not asking you to find new friends right now or to open up to some strangers. All I want is that you go out every now and then. And that you at least give the people who want to get to know you a chance. And all I asked before was if you want to welcome the new year with me." Charles finished._

_"Ok. I will think about going out more often. But I'm not promising anything." Chandler added quickly when he saw his fathers face brighten. "And I don't want to start today. I'm just not in the mood to celebrate the end of this year. It wasn't a very pleasant one. And I'm not sure if the next one will be much better."_

_"Aww, you are just a big old pessimist." Charles joked to lighten the glum atmosphere. "But I won't bother you anymore today. All I wanted from you was that you consider going out again and I accomplished that. So I'm off now. The time is running fast and I don't want to miss the start of the new year." With that Charles turned around and left._

~*~

Chandler had thought about the things his father had said. He knew Charles had been right. He was afraid to meet new people because he was sure they would just hurt him sooner or later.

"Who needs friends anyway?" He mumbled.

"Excuse me?" The old lady sitting next to him asked.

"Oh, I was just talking to myself. I said 'Who needs friends anyway'." The lady looked shocked at this. "No, not that I think to have friends is a bad thing. Just…just, if your so-called friends are some backstabbing people who don't really care about you…" Chandler was getting louder with each word, but stopped when he saw that the woman now seemed really terrified. "Sorry." He said sheepishly. "I didn't mean to scare you. I'm just a little nervous about going to New York." When the woman just kept staring at him Chandler turned away from her and concentrated himself on the little screen showing a movie in front of him.

~*~

Rachel was walking down a street, trying not to bump into the other passer-bys. She was coming from a doctor's appointment. She was now 8 and a half month pregnant and slowly getting nervous about giving birth to her daughter.

She was still living with her mom. Not that she couldn't take an apartment by herself. Her job at Ralph Lauren's was paid quite nicely. But she didn't want to be alone to raise her baby. At least not in the first few months.

She knew it was wishful thinking but she caught herself often daydreaming about her life. She would be living together with Ross, maybe even being in a relationship with him. They would live near their friends, well her ex-friends, and everyone would be happy and together. But the reality was so much different. One hundred eighty degrees different.

She had no friends. At least no close friends. She wasn't living with Ross. Up to last week she was hardly seeing him or really talking with him. Or more correctly Ross wasn't speaking with her. Every time the two of them would meet to discuss the baby and the birth there was an awkward air around them. Ross was still unbelievably mad for what Rachel had done but didn't want to punish their unborn child for Rachel's mistakes.

He would talk about the baby and nothing else. Every time Rachel tried to ask about the others he closed up and changed the topic. At one occasion he said she wouldn't deserve to know anything about the others. That had really hurt Rachel. Maybe because she knew that it was true.

She had asked herself many times why. Why did she lie? She knew why she had kissed Chandler. He was a wonderful man and a great friend. And in a second filled with pregnancy hormones and strong but misinterpreted feelings for her friend she destroyed so many lives. 

She had realized short after the chaos and lying ended that she had panicked and hadn't thought clearly. She should have told the truth from the beginning. She should have apologized and hoped for the best. And even if Monica hadn't have forgiven her and she had lost her best friend, it would have been a thousand times better than to live with the guilt and the knowledge that she destroyed a good marriage and the group of friends. She had told Ross all this on more than one occasion. But he didn't want to hear her reasons. He had said that he could understand her motives to an instant. But that didn't change a thing. He had to stand on his sister's side in this matter. And after that Rachel had given up on trying to explain herself anymore. Since Rachel moved upstate the two of them tried to get together once a week.

~*~

_A week ago_

_Ross made his way up the drive way of Rachel's mother's house. He came over to talk to Rachel again. He had finished changing his guest room into a nursery just a week ago. On most trips to the baby shop he was joined by Monica. Although it was hard for her to buy baby stuff now that her hopes for a baby were shattered she insisted on helping him._

_Ross and Rachel had after many long arguments decided that they would share custody equally. So each of them would have the baby every other week. Ross wasn't happy about this solution. Not that he didn't want his daughter for a whole week or that he didn't want Rachel to have her. He just wished she could be raised in a more stable environment. But he really didn't want to move in together with Rachel. He didn't feel at ease enough around her and it would put a strain on his relationship with his friends and his sister._

_"Oh. Hello, Ross." Sandra greeted the soon-to-be father of her first grandchild after she opened the door. "Come in and make yourself comfortable." She said as she ushered Ross in the direction of the living room. "Did you have a good Christmas?" She asked him._

_"Yes, it was very nice." Ross lied. The truth was that because of the grief among his remaining friends the Christmas had been the opposite of nice. Too many good memories were bound to that specific holiday._

_"I'll go and tell Rachel that you are here." With that she left the room to get Rachel. A few minutes later Rachel entered the room._

_"Hey, Ross. I didn't know you wanted to come today." Rachel said and sat down on the couch. She sat down on the opposite end to where Ross was sitting. Because she knew from past meetings that Ross didn't want to be very near to her._

_"Yeah, well…you are now in your thirty-third week and we still don't have a name for our baby." Ross explained. "And I'm getting a little restless."_

_"Right. I know what you're talking about." Rachel nodded. "So, let's get started. I know it's a little different but I really like the name James for a girl." Rachel suggested, holding her breath, waiting for Ross' reaction. She knew it was unlikely that he would go along with that name. But she genuinely liked it._

_"James? For a girl?" Ross asked, a frown appearing on his face. "I don't think that's a fitting name for a girl."_

_"Fine." Rachel breathed defeated. "Why don't you tell me your ideas first?"_

_"Ok, I have a few that I like." Ross said and pulled a neatly folded sheet of paper out of his pants pocket. He scanned the list before he continued. "Hmm, I think my favorite name for our daughter would be Emma." Ross looked up at Rachel when he saw her head snap toward him. "What? Don't you like that name?"_

_"Isn't that the name Monica chose for her daughter when we were younger?" Rachel asked, pretty sure that she was right._

_"Yes." Ross replied. "It was actually her suggestion."_

_"What? Why would she want us to use that name? Did she change her mind and find another one for her future child?"_

_"No, she said she won't need it any longer." Ross responded distractedly, still scanning his list. He didn't see how Rachel lost all color in her face._

_"But why…why won't she need it?" Rachel almost whispered. But the dull feeling in her stomach told her that she already knew the answer to that question._

_Ross looked up from his task of deciding what name to propose next when he heard Rachel's question._

_"I don't think that it's any of your business. But she gave up on her plan of having children." Ross retorted. His implication was clear to Rachel. That was just another thing she was indirectly responsible for. Rachel hung her head in shame and Ross couldn't help but notice the pain shown on her face. "Look, Rachel, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so harsh. And it's really not the point of this meeting."_

_"It's alright Ross. I know I deserve that. But I don't think we can use the name. As beautiful as it is." Rachel said._

_"You're right. We can't use it." Ross mused. "Because if we would name our child Emma, every time when Monica would hear the name it would remind her that it's the name she wanted to give her daughter."_

_They sat in silence for a while. Ross lost in the pain his sister was still going through and Rachel lost in the guilt she carried. Both of them hoping things would get better in the unknown time lying ahead._

_"Christina." Ross said suddenly into the quietness._

_"What?" Rachel jumped a little, startled out of her gloomy thoughts._

_"For a name. I think it's a great name. And it goes really well with Geller-Green." Ross explained his abrupt outburst._

_"Oh. Christina Geller-Green." Rachel tried the name. "Sounds good. And I like it." Rachel paused. "I think we got our daughter a name." She smiled at Ross._

_"You really like it?" Ross asked quite surprised and couldn't help to smile back at Rachel. "That was easy. Almost too easy." He joked. "Are you sure you like it? I don't want to have to think of a new name in the delivery room."_

_"No, it's perfect." Rachel smiled woeful. "I can't believe it's almost over." She edged nearer to Ross as her eyes began to water._

_Ross closed the rest of the gap and pulled Rachel in his arms._

_"It's going to be OK. I mean, it is probably going to be hard to share our daughter. But the important thing is that we'll both love her so much. And it's just the end of the pregnancy now. But at the same time it's the start of a new, amazing chapter of our lives."_

_"Oh Ross. I'm so sorry." Rachel sobbed and let out all of her pent up feelings. The pain of losing the five most significant people in all her life. The guilt of being the one who ruined it all. And the fear of raising a child all alone. She cried on Ross' shoulder for over an hour and he just held her and tried to calm her down._

~*~

After that day her relationship with Ross went from cold and awkward to almost the way it had been in the beginning of her pregnancy. And now she was less worried about the time after the birth. She wasn't afraid anymore that Ross and she would ague all the time. Or that they would fight over the visitation schedule. All in all, the situation was a lot calmer. They talked more about things other than their daughter. And they started to rebuild a friendship. They still had a long way to go and Rachel knew that Ross wouldn't trust her unconditionally again. But it was a promising start.

TBC...

***************

Ok, that's all for now. I try to write the next part sooner than this one. But as always: I can't promise anything. ;-) Please review this chapter. It means a lot to me.


	10. Chapter 10

Well, I wanted to get this part written and posted a lot earlier since I was ordered to hurry. But I failed. :-(

I hope you can forgive me. ;-) Anyway, here is the next part. And still no Chandler and Monica in this one. But maybe I don't plan on bringing them back together at all. Thought about that? Mwahahaha. Ok, power rush. lol.

And now have fun reading.

DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.

***************

Monica was sitting at her kitchen table, lost in thoughts. She shrieked as the door flew open and crashed into the counter. Just when the door was about to fall shut again Joey rushed through it, gazing intently at the paper in his hand.

"Monica! Monica, where are you? Monica?!" He screamed, running into the living room and then over to the bathroom, apparently not seeing her.

"What's the problem, Joey?" Monica spoke up just before Joey could bring his already raised hand down on the wood of her bedroom door. Startled he spun around and spotted her finally on the chair near the refrigerator.

"Where did you come from so fast?" He asked and made his way toward her.

"I was here all along. But it was really amusing to see you run around like a chicken with its head cut off." Monica laughed. "What can I do for you, Joey?" Monica asked after Joey plopped down an a chair beside her.

"I wanted to show you something." He replied excitedly, shoving the newspaper nearly in her face.

"Ok, then. But you have to lower the newspaper a little." Monica said and took it out of Joey's outstretched hands. She scanned the side but found nothing that would explain Joey's ecstatic behavior.

Joey, never a patient person, grabbed it back and turned it around.

"Did you know that Chandler wrote a book?!" He squeaked.

"What! No, he didn't. You have misread something." Monica said unbelievingly.

"But look…" He said, laying the paper in front of Monica on the table. He pointed at a picture adjacent to the article. "That is Chandler."

"Newest promising author hits city for book signing." Monica read the headline out loud. "After the incredible good selling start of 'The Intruder' … 'The Intruder'?" Monica stopped. "Wait a minute…I've read that." She stood up and went into her bedroom, only to reemerge seconds later with a book in her hands. "See, it can't be Chandler on the picture. This book was written by a Mark Johnson." Monica pointed at the cover after sitting down again.

"But this is Chandler. Look at the picture." Joey insisted.

Monica scrunched her nose as she took the paper again and studied the photo closer.

"I don't know. It's a black and white picture. And not a good one." Monica argued. "Maybe they just look similar."

"Maybe…" Joey replied thoughtful. Suddenly he jerked up. "Now wait a moment…wait a moment. I know that name. It sounds familiar somehow." Joey scratched his chin in his typical 'I'm-thinking-hard'-gesture. Monica watched him, her heart thumping fast in her chest.

"Oh my god!" Joey exclaimed suddenly. "I got it! I know where I heard the name before." Joey was looking at Monica, his eyes opened wide.

"Where, Joey!" Monica snapped impatiently after Joey just sat there for a minute.

"Uhm, remember when Phoebe decided to name one of the triplets after either Chandler or me? And I said to Chandler that his name was stupid?" Monica just nodded, having heard the story. "Well, Chandler then wanted to change his name. His choices were John Markson or…"

"Mark Johnson." Monica finished, her look again landing on the article in front of them.

When Ross entered the apartment moments later he found them both leaning over the newspaper, reading the article once again.

"What are you reading?" Ross asked.

Monica hadn't heard him enter nor did she hear his question. And Joey didn't acknowledge Ross' presence either. So Ross went over to the table and leaned over Joey's shoulder to see what had bound their attention.

"Oh my god!" He screamed after he saw the picture. His exclamation startled Joey and Monica out of their trance.

"God, Ross! You scared me." Monica scolded.

"Sorry. But what…when…how?" Ross didn't know what question to ask first.

"I don't know! Ok!? All I know is what is written in this article."

"And that's really Chandler?" Ross asked.

"We are pretty sure that it's him." Monica said. "But…there is only one way to find out if it's true." Monica mused.

"What do you mean?" Joey wanted to know. But Ross had already caught up with Monica's plan.

"You don't really want to go to that book signing, do you?" Ross asked. "I mean, even if it is Chandler. Do you think he would like to see you there?"

"I…I don't know." Monica wasn't sure what to do. "No, I have to do this. I have to see him. If I don't go I think I'll regret it for the rest of my life." Monica said determined.

"I would love to go with you. But I have an audition in twenty minutes. And Phoebe is in Montauk visiting her mother." Joey chimed in.

"And I have to meet Rachel at the doctors office at 2 o'clock." Ross said.

"Then I'll go by myself." Monica decided. "Hey, did you say 2 o'clock?" Monica asked suddenly.

"Yeah…Why?"

"Well, since we have 2 o'clock right now…" Monica pointed at the clock hanging on the wall. "And you are still here, I would say you are going to be late."

Ross checked his wristwatch and tapped a few times on the glass. "Dammit, it's broken."

"Uh, Ross?" Joey started after Ross fiddled with his watch for a few minutes. "Shouldn't you rather be running right now than moaning about your stupid watch?"

"Dammit!" Ross exclaimed again before rushing out of the apartment, leaving his two snickering friends behind.

******************

Rachel was fuming that Ross hadn't made it to the appointment. She had told him about it a week ago and had reminded him yesterday. She couldn't help but think that Ross wouldn't have forgotten an appointment if things were good between them. But then again, things were getting better and she had to take what he was willing to give her.

Rachel came around the last corner and saw her destination. Even so it was the nearest underground station from the location of her doctors office she dreaded the walk more every time she had to go to an exam. Again she wished Ross would be there. Than she could take out her frustration on him. That was one of the few benefits of pregnancy. You could be as bitchy as you wanted without being judged.

Rachel wasn't paying attention when she made her first step onto the crosswalk. She was pulled out of her thoughts when she heard the horn of a car and the screeching of tires on asphalt.

TBC...

******************

Ok, that was chapter 10. I hope you enjoyed it. And I would love it if you would review. I have a very low self-confidence and need constant encouragement. ;-) 


	11. Chapter 11

Here is the newest chapter. But first I want to thank all of you who reviewed. That really means a lot to me. And it inspires me to write faster. And anhonestmoose, your review got me to think. Does Chandler even know how to drive a car? Cause everyone else did already drive on the show. Or it was at least mentioned. If someone knows an episode where Chandler drives a car or he or someone else says he drove a car, please let me know. :-)

Ok, this chapter is dedicated to Tim. Because he didn't laugh. ;-)

DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.

***************

Monica made her way into the book store. She checked the time and was relieved when she noticed that she was early. That meant she could look around a little. She went through some rows of book shelves and scanned the selection. But she realized that she had to be in the part with the traveling literature and she preferred novels. So she started to search for the spot where the actual signing would take place.

Monica took in her surroundings and had to admit that the atmosphere was really peaceful. The place wasn't as packed as the discount stores she usually went to. And the cozy chairs and couches scattered across the room where great to sit down and relax a little during the book search.

When Monica came to the end of yet another row with books she saw her goal. It consisted of two tables standing near the wall with banners and posters all around them. The decoration showed the cover of 'The Intruder'. And in front of the tables was already a small crowd of people holding books they wanted to get signed.

The more Monica thought about it now, the more she could see similarities from Chandler's real life shining through in the book. It was a Thriller about industry espionage and the hero was a bored middle management employee. Somewhere she had read once that writers should write about experiences out of their real lives. And apparently Chandler had done that. At least for the ground work. Monica didn't think that he had ever made any real-based knowledge in the field of industry espionage.

"Monica?" Someone called. Monica turned around to locate the person addressing her. "Monica, over here." The voice called again. And finally Monica saw the owner of it. She walked over to the frantically waving woman.

"Hello, Janice." Monica smiled. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, I read about this book signing in the paper and thought the guy looked a lot like Chandler. So I wanted to see if I was right." Janice replied before throwing her head back and falling into one of her extremely loud laughing fits. "And now that I see you here it's quite clear that I was right." Janice beamed, placing a hand on Monica's arm. But then a frown appeared on her face. "But what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be somewhere 'backstage' with Chandler?" Janice pointed to the door behind the tables.

Monica grimaced. She didn't really want to tell Janice the story of her tragically short marriage. But she couldn't just ignore the question and she didn't feel like lying to Janice either. Even so that woman was annoying as hell she had never been anything but nice to Monica.

"Well, you would think so." Monica began hesitatingly. "But, you know, we're not married anymore." She mumbled her eyes firmly on her shoes. When she heard Janice gasp she lifted her view to the brunette in front of her.

"How could that happen?" Janice whined. "You guys weren't even married for a year!"

"Yeah. You see…" Monica wanted to explain, but Janice interrupted her.

"Oh my god…did he cheat on you?"

"No! It was my fault." Monica started again.

"YOU cheated on HIM!?" Janice screamed. "I can't believe it…" She continued, but this time she was the one getting interrupted.

"Nobody cheated, ok!?" Monica yelled at Janice. And then she told Janice the whole sad story. Janice listened with a look of shock on her face. Every now and then she cast a glance over to the door. As if she could see Chandler through it.

"And now I'm here, not really knowing why. I mean I don't think he wants to see me. But I just had to come, you know." Monica finished waiting for Janice to say something.

But Janice just looked at her, unable to form a coherent thought. Monica couldn't stand Janice's stare any longer and looked absentmindedly at her watch. She was worried by what she saw. She threw a quick glance in the direction of the tables. She had totally lost time while telling Janice her recent life story. And now it was already over half an hour after the scheduled beginning of the signing. And it still hadn't started. But maybe she had gotten the time wrong.

"Uhm…Janice? When should this thing here start again?" She asked.

"What?" Janice asked with a high voice, slowly coming out of her shock.

"What time should it begin?" Monica asked again.

Janice looked over to the restless crowd of fans. And then she looked at the time before turning back to Monica.

"You are right. It should've started already." Janice confirmed. "I wonder what happened."

"Maybe we should try to find out." Monica said, relieved that she could distract Janice from the previous topic. Reluctantly Janice turned around and started heading over to the tables.

"I think you are right. Come on." She said over her shoulder before walking over to three suit clad man standing beside the tables. 

"Excuse me." Janice interrupted their conversation. "But I wondered if you are taking part in this happening and if you could tell us what the problem is."

"Hello." The youngest man replied. "My name is Victor Beaumont and I am Mr. …uhm… Mr. Johnson's lawyer." Monica frowned at this, having the feeling that she'd heard that name before but before she could say anything Janice was already speaking again.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Beaumont. I'm Janice and this is Monica." Janice introduced the two of them. "Since you are _Mr. Johnson's_ lawyer" Janice winked at him. "You can surely tell us if the signing is still taking place. And when we can count on seeing _Mr. Johnson_." Janice winked again in a more than obvious way.

Victor got a little freaked out by this woman. He didn't know why she kept winking at him. He turned his look over to the other woman and gasped. Almost inaudible but still heard by the two women. He recognized one of them from a picture Chandler had shown him. That was Monica. The Monica. Chandler's Monica.

"Oh, sure. We…we reckon with Mr. Johnson's presence any moment now." He tried to sound upbeat to not give away his worry. Chandler should have been there nearly an hour ago and he still hadn't called to explain his absence.

Monica couldn't help herself but something about that lawyer was familiar. She was sure she had heard the name before and his reaction just confirmed her feeling. But before she could follow that thought her cell phone started ringing.

"Oh, excuse me for a moment." she said before she turned around for some privacy.

Janice looked knowingly at Victor.

"So, you are Chandler's lawyer?" Janice asked, laughing when she saw his eyes grow wide with shock. But he caught himself and started to reply.

"I don't know what…" Right in that moment his cell phone began to ring too. "Oh, I'm really sorry. But I have to answer that." Victor said with a small smug on his face. He walked a few steps away, thanking god for the interruption.

"Hello? Victor Beaumont speaking." He said. "Chandler. Where the hell are you?" He whispered after recognizing the person on the other end. "What happened? …Oh my god. But is everything ok now? …No, they are not. I mean the owners aren't exactly dancing for joy. But let me handle this. You have your own problems right now…No, I come out there. Where are you? …I'll be there as soon as possible…Ok, bye." He put his phone back into his pocket and turned back around, looking for the two women. Monica looked very worried and was talking to Janice.

"…don't know what's going on. But I have to go. Bye." Victor heard the end of Monica's conversation with Janice when he passed them. Monica then turned around and rushed in the direction of the exit.

In front of the store she almost bummed into someone standing on the sidewalk.

"Oh, sorry. I almost…" Monica stopped short when she was face to face with Victor again.

"That's alright. Nothing happened." He replied, wondering why she was in such a rush. But before he could ask her she was throwing herself onto the backseat of the cab she had hailed.

~*~

Rachel's heart almost stopped when the car raced past her, missing her by just a few inches. The suction almost pulled her further out on the street. Rachel struggled to keep her balance and tried to get back onto the sidewalk. She succeeded to take a step back but her foot got caught on the edge and she felt herself falling backwards.

She groaned in pain as she landed hard on her coccyx. Rachel bit down on her lower lip and closed her eyes, trying to bare the sting flowing through her whole body. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes again, looking up at the small crowd that had now gathered around her.

In front of her kneeled a man, his cab blocking the street behind him. He was obviously talking to her. Rachel tried to concentrate on what he was saying.

"Are you alright? Can you stand up?" He asked.

Rachel managed a small smile and tried to stand up. But she couldn't get up. Just that morning she hadn't been able to stand up from the couch. How was she supposed to get up from the pavement? When the man saw her problem he reached out to grab her hands and pulled her to a standing position.

"Thank you." Rachel said thankfully. "I don't think that I broke anything. Although, it hurt like hell." Rachel said, noticing the other people leaving them to return to their own lives.

"You must have had a guardian angel. That speeding idiot almost hit you." The man shook his head. "But you should go to the hospital to get yourself checked out anyway."

"Oh, I don't think that…" Rachel couldn't finish her sentence because a sudden pain shot through her abdomen. She clutched her stomach with both hands and tried to breath through the pain. Just like she'd learned it during the Lamaze classes she and Ross had taken.

The cab driver jumped forward and held Rachel's arm to steady her.

"Ok, I think now it's obvious that you need to go to the hospital."

Rachel shot him an annoyed look and the man took the hint to shut his mouth. He had three kids and knew what a woman in labor was like.

"Right. Let me just check with my passenger and then I can take you to a doctor." He said before turning around to a man standing beside the taxi. Rachel followed his glance and gasped.

"Chandler…"

TBC...

***********

We are coming nearer to the end. Maybe two more chapters. Now after you've read this you have to have an opinion about it. So please leave a review. But just good ones. ;-)


	12. Chapter 12

Wow, ok. This one goes out to anhonestmoose. Because you seem to like this story so much that you review one chapter three times. ;-) And hey, good work with the Chandler driving thing. Oh, and let me assure you that I write the chapters as fast as I can. And you have to agree that I've gotten better. In the beginning I just updated once every few months.

DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.

**********

Chandler couldn't believe his luck. Millions of people living in New York City and who had to fall to his feet, literally? The one person he thought he would never see again. Well, definitely one of the people he never wanted to see again.

He was shocked by the sudden reappearance of Rachel in his life. But he was more than glad that she wasn't hurt. And these mixed feelings were confusing him. Because his relief went deeper than the relief he would feel for a stranger. Did that mean he still cared about Rachel? After all the time he had tried to tell himself that he didn't need friends, neither his old friends nor any new ones.

Chandler didn't know how to process all his thoughts and feelings. So he just stood rooted to his spot beside the car, staring at the scene unfolding in front of him. His eyes followed every move Rachel made but out of the corner of his eye he saw the cab driver turning around to him. And then Rachel's look fell on Chandler and he heard her gasp and utter his name.

The cabbie, still steadying Rachel and holding her arm, changed his view from Rachel to Chandler and back.

"Do you two know each other?" He asked, like so often amazed about how small New York City really was. As a taxi driver he had seen the weirdest things. And he didn't believe in coincidences. But he believed in fate and he got the feeling that this meeting was important for these people.

"Yeah." Rachel whispered looking into Chandler's eyes. Chandler still couldn't find any words.

"Well, then it shouldn't be a problem to bring her to the hospital before I take you to your destination." The driver said to Chandler, pulling him out of his trance.

"Oh, no. No." Chandler replied quickly. "You can take her to the hospital. I…I'll…just take another cab." Chandler felt a pang of guilt when he saw Rachel's pleading face. But then he remembered who she was and what she had done and he broke the eye contact to look at his hands. "I'm sorry, Rachel. But I just…I can't." Chandler lifted his gaze back to Rachel's face.

"It's ok Chandler. I totally understand that…" But again an almost unbearable pain prevented her from ending the sentence. She doubled over and swayed on her legs. If it wasn't for the man holding her arm she would've fallen down again. And she wanted nothing more then to lie down and curl into a fetal position. "Something…isn't…right…" Rachel managed to get out through clenched teeth.

The cab driver was now fully alert and began to move Rachel toward the vehicle.

"Listen, Mister. I don't know what kind of problem you have with this woman. But I think it's necessary that you join her in the back seat because I have to drive. And I have the feeling that this aren't just normal labor pains." He added, casting a concerned glance at Rachel, who had paled to a scary white and was wobbling on her unsteady legs. When Chandler saw her swaying like that he acted almost as if on autopilot. Without a second thought he jumped forward and took Rachel's other arm. "You made the right decision." The cabbie nodded, relieved that he wouldn't have to take the woman to the hospital all by himself.

The two men guided Rachel to the car and helped her into the back. She was shaking now and in a cold sweat. She grabbed Chandler's hand as soon as he slid in beside her.

"Please don't let anything happen to my baby." Rachel pleaded with tears streaming down her cheeks. She clung at Chandler's sleeve, forcing him to look at her. "Please, Chandler, promise me you won't let anything happen to her." She begged before another wave of pain had her screaming.

"Shhh, don't talk, Rachel. It's all going to be alright." Chandler tried to reassure her. He exchanged a worried glance through the rear view mirror with the driver. He knew that women in labor had to endure horrible pain but somehow he had a sinking suspicion that things weren't as they were supposed to be and he prayed that they would reach the hospital soon.

************

Still no Monica and Chandler in this chapter. That's your cliffhanger-punishment, Vikki. ;-)

Now that you made it this far please leave a review. Thanks. :-)


	13. Chapter 13

I don't really have much to say this time. Just thank you all for the reviews. Keep them coming. You guys are the best. :-D

Oh, and how FAST did I write this part. Huh?

Ok, now on with the story.

DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine.

****************

On the way to the hospital Rachel groaned with pain every half minute and just mumbled incoherently in response to Chandler's anxious questions. He was getting more worried with every mile they got nearer to their destination. And just when the driver said it would only take another couple of minutes Rachel's water broke.

"Oh god. Her water broke. Her water broke!" Chandler screamed. He had Rachel's head in his lap und was stroking her hair in an attempt to reassure her as much as trying to calm himself down.

But his cool was forgotten by the time he discovered that her water had broken. And then he was terrified to his core when he saw the liquid soaking through Rachel's white skirt.

"Oh dear god." He murmured. "There is blood. She is bleeding…down there. Drive faster, man. She needs a doctor. Right now!" Chandler shouted to the cabbie and turned his attention back to Rachel who lay motionless in his arms by now.

"Rachel? Rach?!" He tried to reach her through her anguish. "You can't go to sleep now, hun. You don't want to miss the birth of your little baby girl now, do you?"

Rachel's eyes flattered a few times before they opened to small slits, staring scared up at Chandler's tear brimmed eyes.

"This is my punishment, Chandler." She whispered barely audible. She took a shaky breath as Chandler shook his head. "Please…just save my baby…I know I deserve to die, but…" Rachel stopped when a new wave of cramps shot through her abdomen.

"Rachel, don't say things like that. You don't deserve to die." Chandler was frightened by the direction Rachel's thoughts took. Sure, she had hurt him and all the others. But he had never wanted anything to happen to her. "Maybe a little suffering…" He tried to joke. Rachel gave a slight chuckle.

"No." She replied surprisingly firm. "No, I deserve this. What I did was…"

"Rachel. Listen to me." Chandler interrupted her. "What you did was wrong. We both know that. But you are a good person. You were my friend for a long time." Chandler grasped just how true that was. In all the years he had known her she had always been a good friend. "You made a mistake. But you didn't know that your action would trigger all the mess that followed." Chandler reasoned. And then he surprised them both with his next sentence. "I don't blame you."

Rachel was shocked by that and forgot her pain for a moment. "But what I did, it destroyed the group and it made Monica and you file for divorce." She whispered.

"Yeah, that's right. But I just realized I don't blame you for that. Not anymore at least." Chandler said and took one of her hands in his own hand. "When you think about it, we all reacted wrong to the situation. The others believed the lie without questioning it and I was so hurt by that, so I didn't really try to make them see the truth. I did what I'm best at. I ran." Chandler saw the whole situation for the first time objectively. And it made him realize something. "I'm tired. I'm tired of running. My dad told me a little while ago that I should give people a chance to get to know me." Rachel gave him a confused look from her position on his knees. "I realize that you already know me. What I'm trying to say is…I want to give you a second chance. So after you gave birth to your little girl we sit down and talk. What do you say?" He asked, giving Rachel's hand a squeeze.

"Oh Chandler…" Rachel didn't know what to say. Tears of relief mixed with her tears of pain. "I can't believe you mean that." Rachel closed her eyes, again trying to breath through her pain.

"There's the hospital." The driver pointed his finger to a building right in front of them. He drove over to the emergency room entrance and shut off the engine.

"Rach, we are at the hospital. Can you get up?" Chandler asked her. But he didn't get a response. "Rachel?" He repeated. "Rachel, wake up!" Chandler turned his head when the cabbie opened the door beside him. "She doesn't wake up. Please, go in there and get someone."

The man turned on his heels and sprinted through the glass doors. He almost ran into them because they didn't open fast enough.

A few seconds later he came back with a few people wearing blue scrubs in tow.

"What do we have here?" A doctor in his late forties asked after he reached the open cap door.

"She is pregnant and…and she fell onto the sidewalk." Chandler replied.

"Do you know in which month she is? And did her water break?" The doctor questioned.

"I…I don't know." Chandler tried to calculate the right answer. "She has to be somewhere in her eighth month. But I'm not sure. And her water broke a few minutes ago. But…she is bleeding, doctor. It's soaking through her skirt. And now I can't get her to wake up." Chandler added while climbing out of the car. He noticed the worried glance the doctor exchanged with a nurse beside him and got even more nervous. "Doctor?" He asked in a worried voice.

"Ok, now get out of the way and let us do our job." The nurse took him by the arm and led him a few steps away from the car. He watched over her head how two orderlies leaned into the door and pulled Rachel carefully out of the car to put her onto a gurney. Then it all happened really fast. The group of medics rushed Rachel into the building and pushed her over to some doors. Chandler followed closely behind and took a place beside Rachel's head after they transferred her onto a bigger gurney.

He held one of her hands again and stroked her hair with his other one. He couldn't take his eyes of the professional rush with that the doctors and nurses worked on Rachel.

"Ok, she is hemorrhaging, so we need to get the baby out of her and stop the bleeding." One doctor said to Chandler. "And we have to get her to an OR soon if we don't want to make an emergency c-section right here. Why don't you wait outside and I let you know what's going on?"

"No." Chandler said so forcefully that the other people in the room stopped what they were doing for a moment. "I promised her that I would stay with her. And I'll not break that promise."

"Ok." The doctor replied after a moment. "You can come with her into the OR. But you have to get into some sterile clothes. Why don't you go with a sister and get them while we prepare your wife for the surgery?"

"Ok." Was all Chandler said before he followed a nurse outside. He didn't even acknowledge the fact that they thought he was Rachel's husband. He was still in shock about what was happening.

After he got cleaned up and clad in scrubs he was brought up to an OR. Before he went in there he turned to the nurse and asked her to call Ross. Then he pushed the door open and entered the room. Once in there he immediately rushed to a place beside Rachel's head. The medical team had obviously not waited for his appearance to begin because short after his arrival they introduced Rachel's little daughter to the world. Chandler had tears running down his face after he caught a glimpse of the small, blood smeared newborn. By the noise she was making with her crying it was pretty clear the she was going to be ok.

Chandler returned his concentration on Rachel once again. He hoped that his friend would make it to see her sweet baby, and to work things out between them. All his feelings from before and his fears seemed ridiculous now. There were more important things in live. And as clichéd as it may seem, life was just too short to waste. All these and more thoughts ran through Chandler's head as he watched the doctors frenetically trying to save Rachel.

****************

Ok, I hope you enjoyed this part. It has gotten longer then I intended it to be. So I didn't come to the point I wanted to reach. As someone put it: "get Monica and Chandler in the same room". That's my goal for the next chapter. ;) But...I don't promise anything.

Now if you leave a review I try to write the next part as fast as this one. Oh, and I go to an Eminem concert today, so if you never hear from me again that probably means I didn't make it out of the stadium. ;)


	14. Chapter 14

I'm so sorry this part took so long. Family trouble, severe writer's block and, I admit, laziness came between me and my writing. But now I'm back and I'll try to finish this story as soon as possible. You should probably browse the last chapter again to refresh your memory.

And now on with the story. I hope the wait was worth it. Enjoy!

~*~*~*~

The doors to the hospital whooshed open and a worried looking Ross ran through them, not stopping until he reached the reception.

"Rach…Rachel Green…?" He managed to say before all the running caught up to him and he lost his breath. He doubled over, gasping heavily, and held his index finger up to the woman standing behind the counter. He took some deep breaths and after a few seconds he stood upright again. Just when he wanted to talk to the receptionist properly he got interrupted by Joey and Phoebe. The two entered the emergency room hallway not looking much better than Ross did moments before.

"Man, Ross. I didn't think you could outrun me." Joey said at the same time as Phoebe exclaimed. "Did you find out about Rachel yet?"

Ignoring Joey's statement Ross turned around to face Phoebe. "No, I was just going to ask." With that he changed his attention back on the now amused looking receptionist and tried again. "I'm looking for Rachel Green. She's having our baby and I was called by a nurse saying I had to come down here as fast as possible." The amusement left the face of the receptionist and she replied after a short pause. "Hmm…let me see what I have in my computer regarding this patient. Rachel Greep was it?"

"No, Green…like the color." Phoebe corrected her.

"Ooookay…here she is." The woman said while checking the monitor. "She is up on the fourth floor. I don't have a room number yet. But someone up there should be able to help you."

"Ok, thank you." Joey said and turned to follow Ross and Phoebe who were already running over to the elevators.

Sure, Joey hoped Rachel and the baby would be ok. But he hadn't spoken to her in so long that she was almost a stranger to him. In the beginning he had really resented her for what she had done to his friends. But he wasn't the type of person who never forgave mistakes. In fact he couldn't hold a grudge for long. So it was now more some kind of disappointment he felt for Rachel than real anger.

Once inside the elevator he looked over at Ross. His friend was almost hopping from one foot to the other he was so nervous. Joey thought about the situation Ross had been in when they found out the truth about Rachel's lie. And Joey realized that he was glad Ross and Rachel had more or less made up and were now starting to rebuild their friendship. They had always been good friends and after surviving the hard break-up the two had had at the end of their first relationship Joey thought they could get through everything. And now with the baby almost being born it was good to see the parents in some sort of stable friendship.

Like a typical hospital elevator it took agonizing long to reach the fourth floor. As soon as the doors opened Ross and Phoebe were rushing out of the cabin over to the nurse's station and Joey found himself shuffling behind them for the umpteenth time that day.

Ross went over to the only nurse in sight.

"Excuse me, I'm looking for Rachel Green."

"Oh, sure. Let me look if I can find out something for you. My shift just started and I wasn't here when she was brought in." The nurse replied, smiling warmly at Ross.

"Ok. Ehm, we'll be in the waiting room, I guess." Ross said unsure.

"I'm sure I'll find you." And with that she went down the corridor.

Ross turned around to Phoebe and Joey.

"Well, I guess now we have to wait." Ross stated, concern lining his eyes.

"Don't worry too much, Ross. I have no doubt that everything is fine. I can sense that, y'know." Phoebe tried to calm Ross down.

"Yeah." Joey agreed. "Why don't you go call Monica while we wait? She wouldn't want to miss this." Joey added as an afterthought.

"Right." Ross said quietly with his head hanging. "You're right. She would want to be here." He said perking up. Joey smiled, relieved that he could take Ross' thoughts away from Rachel for a moment. "But you two have to stay here in case the nurse comes back."

"Don't worry Ross. We won't go anywhere." Phoebe reassured Ross. Nodding his head Ross turned around and made his way down the hall in search for the payphones.

~*~*~*~

A pale Chandler left the operating room where doctors were finishing up now. He had never before in his life seen that much blood. And he didn't want to see something like that ever again. Chandler had asked a nurse before to call Ross or someone else from the gang and now he knew he had to call Victor.

He made his way on wobbling legs in the direction of the outdoor terrace where another nurse had directed him to. There he was allowed to use his cell phone without the danger of it interfering with any of the medical equipment.

Once outside, Chandler leaned heavily on the banister that bordered the gallery lining the front side of the building. After a moment of calming down he took in his surroundings, studying the other people standing like him in the drizzle for one reason or another. Some had phones on their ears talking either happily excited or gloomily composed with the person on the other end. Other where just out there to appease their addiction to cigarettes.

As much as Chandler craved a cigarette right then he was member of the first group; out there in the cold to use the phone. So he sighed deeply and pressed the speed dial button for his friend Victor.

~*~*~*~

Chandler hung up the phone, relieved to know that Victor would come to the hospital. Chandler knew that he could most likely not avoid crossing paths with the others and it was a little comforting to know that he wouldn't be alone. He turned around and put his elbows on the balustrade to rest his head on his hands, looking out into the gray depressing city.

A few minutes later Chandler took a last deep breath and headed back through the white sterile hospital halls. Down by the nurse's station he saw three familiar looking figures talking together. He stopped when he was near enough to hear them talking.

"Monica is already on her way." Ross told to Phoebe and Joey. "And my and Rachel's parents will be here within the next hour." Chandler's will to make himself noticed faded after he heard Monica's name.

"See, I told you Monica would want to be here. Even if she still isn't really on speaking terms with Rachel. She is still her oldest friend." Chandler was surprised to hear what Phoebe said. He had thought that Monica and Rachel had reconciled already. He had assumed that nothing could keep those two apart for long. 

"I think you are right." Ross agreed. "Oh, did you hear something about Rachel already?" He added.

"No, nothing." Joey answered placing his hand on Ross' shoulder. "But I'm sure everything is alright and a nurse will come any minute to bring you to her."

"I hope you are right. I can't live with this uncertainty any longer." Ross said miserably.

That was Chandler's last straw. He couldn't see Ross like that any longer. So he cleared his throat and three heads spun around simultaneously to focus on his still scrubs wearing statue.

TBC…

~*~*~*~

I don't know why but this part was really hard to write. I would appreciate if you could tell me what you think about it. Please leave a review.


	15. Chapter 15

Thanks for all your reviews – especially the recently given. They got me to work harder on breaking my writers block. Big thanks to Vikki, who somehow inspired me yesterday so I wrote more than half of this part. And a thanks to all of you for still reading this story even though I'm a very, very slow updater. Oh, and it could help to cross-read the last chapters again. I had to do it too. ;-)

I know you all want to read the chapter now, so without further ado, enjoy this extra-long part.

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"Oh doctor, do you know…" Ross trailed of as he recognized the face in front of him. He heard Phoebe gasp loudly beside him.

"I didn't know you were a doctor? And what are you doing here in New York?" Phoebe asked.

Chandler had to smile. These where the things he missed most about them; Ross who was now stuttering some incoherent words, Phoebe with her weird unfitting questions, and the unawareness of Joey who still hadn't looked up at Chandler's face and therefore didn't know what the others were fussing about.

"Rachel is alright." Chandler said first to relieve some of Ross' worries. "It looked bad for some time but she pulled through."

"And…and what about our baby?" Ross asked, stopping Joey's outburst of sudden identification.

"They took her to the baby ward. But she was alright." Chandler replied before turning to Joey. "And yes, it's me."

"But…how…why?" Joey exclaimed loudly with the breath he had been holding while Chandler and Ross exchanged the more important information.

"What are you doing here? And what do you know about Rachel?" Ross queried.

"That's a long story…" Chandler started.

"Ohh, I love long stories." Phoebe threw in and looked to her side at an eagerly nodding Joey.

"It's not a nice story." Chandler scolded with a stern look. Phoebe and Joey realized where they were and why they were there. Phoebe signaled for Chandler to go on.

"Well, the car in front of my cab nearly ran her over."

Ross gasped. "Oh my god. But she is ok, right?" he wanted to know.

"Yes, Ross, she should be alright now." Chandler assured him. "Anyway, she fell backwards onto the sidewalk and something happened because shortly after that she first went into labor and then started bleeding." Chandler ignored the others horrified reactions and carried on. "It turned out that the fall caused her placenta to partly rip of the wall. They had to make a cesarean section to get the child out fast so they could treat the internal bleeding. They managed to stop the hemorrhaging before Rachel lost too much blood. But it was really close there for a moment."

"And you where with her the whole time? How did you not faint with all the blood?" Phoebe tried to lighten the mood. Joey and Ross where still speechless after hearing Chandler's summary. They all realized how close they had come to loosing Rachel forever.

Chandler smiled, appreciating Phoebe's try, when the nurse came back and demanded their attention.

*****************

A nurse led the others to Rachel's room so Chandler made his way over to the vending machines in search of a much needed coffee. With a cup full of the, for hospitals typical, stale tasting brew in his still slightly trembling hands he went to sit on a bench in front of the building to wait for Viktor.

He hadn't been sitting there for more than five minutes when he noticed a petit dark haired woman exiting a cab. After a moment of watching the woman's frantic movements of paying her fare with exhaustion-caused idleness he realized that it was Monica. He sat up straight with shock written on his face. But when he saw Monica walking towards the hospital he cowered down and hoped that she wouldn't recognize him. He closed his eyes in apprehension awaiting Monica's reaction to seeing him. But when nothing happened after a minute he opened his eyes again and turned his head slowly in direction of the hospital entrance. Monica was nowhere in sight.

She was probably too stressed and nervous to be aware of anything around her. Chandler felt relieved that Monica hadn't seen him. But at the same time a little part of him was disappointed. It was the same part that made him realize before that he wasn't really mad at Rachel any longer.

He shook his head in confusion before he closed his eyes again and leant against the backrest. He just entered the zone between sleep and awake when a hand on his shoulder startled him into consciousness again.

He didn't know how much adrenalin was left in his body after that weird exciting day but his heart thumped in his ears when he jumped up and looked at the person wakening him.

"Whoa, easy there, Chandler. You look like you're on the verge of a heart attack." Viktor joked after jerking his hand back.

"Well, it's not nice to sneak up on someone like that." Chandler countered.

"Sneak up? I called your name at least five times but you were so out of it that you didn't hear me." Viktor defended himself.

"Whatever." Chandler sighed driving his hands through his hair. "Now that you're here we can go back to the hotel."

Viktor looked surprised by that. "Don't you want to stay here for a while and talk to your friends?"

"I already spoke to all of them but Monica some time ago telling them the details about Rachel. And I saw Monica rushing by a couple of minutes before you came. And I know that I'm not ready to talk to her yet." Chandler said. "So why should I stay here any longer?"

"I…I don't really know. If you don't want to stay we can go to the hotel." Viktor relented. "But before we go I have to tell you who I met at the book store."

*****************

Monica rushed through the hospital floors nearly running by the time she caught sight of Ross and the others in a little waiting area.

"Oh god, what happened?" Monica asked when she saw the glum faces of Ross and Phoebe. Joey had fallen asleep with his head resting on Phoebe's shoulder.

"Oh, Mon, we don't know for sure but… someone told us that Rachel's alright." Ross said, not mentioning Chandler. The other three had agreed not to say anything to Monica about him till they knew if he was still going to be around. They didn't want to get Monica's hope up in case that Chandler was going back to Vegas without speaking to any of them again. "But they won't let us into her room right now because they are still settling her in. The nurse said Rachel would probably be asleep for the next hour anyway."

"We were waiting for you because we want to go see Christina." Phoebe said while shaking Joey softly to wake him up.

"Where is Chandler?" Joey mumbled wiping the sleep out of his eyes.

"He must've had a very vivid dream." Ross said to a shocked looking Monica. Phoebe poked Joey in his rips.

"Hey! Phoebe, why did you do that?" Joey complained. Then he saw Monica standing in front of him and realized what he did.

"Ok, let's go already!" Ross diverted Monica's attention from Joey by linking his arm with hers. "I wanna see my daughter."

*****************

Minutes later the four of them stood behind a large window gazing down at the newest addition to their group.

"She's beautiful, Ross." Monica said softly, grazing the glass in front of her.

"Who would have thought that you and Rachel would make such a cute baby?" Phoebe wondered.

"Yeah," Joey acceded. "I mean, Rachel…that I can understand. But Ross..." He trailed off after seeing Ross staring at him. "Phoebe, would you come with me to the cafeteria?" Joey didn't even wait for an answer. He grabbed her elbow and led her away from the still mad looking Ross.

Monica looked like tears were starting to form in her eyes and Ross had a pretty good idea why his sister was down. Just as he wanted to console her he heard a voice behind him.

*****************

"You mean Monica came to the book store to see me?" Chandler asked astound not knowing what to think about that information.

"Yeah, I'm sure it was Monica. And she and another, by the way, very annoying woman were asking explicit for you."

"Annoying woman?" Chandler asked a vague suspicion entering in his mind.

"Yeah, y'know, weird dresser, loud and nasal voice…"

"Oh my god." Chandler laughed.

"Hey! You sound exactly like her."

"Well, Viktor, you managed to meet two of my ex-lovers at the same time. And you survived." Chandler added when the memories of Janice came back to his inner eye.

"Two?" Viktor asked with wide eyes. "You mean you dated…"

"That's right. I dated Janice, that's her name, a couple years ago. Once or twice…or a few times." Chandler got quieter with every word and Viktor had to lean in to understand all.

"You dated her more than once!" Viktor couldn't believe his ears.

"Ok, ok, let's not discuss my ex-girlfriends." Chandler was getting aggravated and his friend knew not to pressure him anymore.

"So, what do you wanna do about Monica?"

"What do you mean? I don't have to do anything." Chandler didn't want to think about Monica.

"Well, I just mean that Monica obviously still loves you or at least cares for you enough to try and talk to you again." Viktor reasoned.

"But that's not my problem. I don't want to talk to her. I don't need her."

Viktor saw that Chandler felt defensive but he thought that he saw the problem now.

"You still love her!" Viktor exclaimed. Chandler opened his mouth but couldn't even say anything to that so Viktor kept going. "That's it. You still love her but you are too afraid and too stubborn to admit it to yourself."

Chandler fell heavily back onto the bench. "But even if you're right and I still love her. I won't risk my heart again. I know that it wouldn't survive if it got broken again." Chandler looked at the ground in front of his shoes. "So why should I put it out there again?"

"That's the saddest and…dumbest I've ever heard." Viktor shook his head. "Do you want to live the rest of your life alone? If you don't take the risk you're never going to find love again. And what a miserable life would that be?"

"I don't need to find a new love. I already had the perfect one. And it's better to have a life with a lonely heart than with a shattered one." Chandler argued.

"Listen," Viktor sat down beside Chandler with a sigh. "I don't think I need to make you see what's obvious to me. Somewhere inside you know yourself that you'll regret it your whole life if you let this chance slip through your hands. Don't you remember how crestfallen you were after you've gotten Monica's signature under the divorce papers?"

Chandler nodded his head but said nothing.

"As your lawyer it's my job to give you advice but this one comes as your friend." Viktor put his hand on Chandler's shoulder. "Go talk to her. See if you can discover your true feelings. And maybe see hers as well. And if you don't want to get back together with her now or later at least try to become friends again. You told me how your group had a close friendship. Don't you want that back?"

Chandler nodded for a few seconds before he turned his face to Viktor.

"You are right. I did this long enough now. I don't want to keep hiding for the rest of my life." Chandler stood up and turned to Viktor again. "I'll go and talk to her. I don't know what to feel right now but I hope that I at least manage to talk a few thing through with her."

"Ok, that's great. And I'll drive back to the hotel. I still have a few calls to make."

Viktor got up and walked with a smile on his face towards the street. Chandler on the other hand looked like a man about to be hung. He straightened his posture and with a deep breath he started to enter the hospital in search of his future. An unsure future but a future none-the-less. The next half hour would probably define the rest of his existence. He could win everything that really counts – friendship and love – or lose it all and be a bitter lonely man forever.

TBC…

*****************

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Vikki, but this chapter got so long that I couldn't get to the part where Monica and Chandler are in one room together talking. But I thought this would be a good place to stop.

My writers block seems to be defeated for now. But you need to encourage me to write more. So, please help me and review.


	16. Chapter 16

I'm sorry that it took so long. God, how often did I already say that? hehe. But again, I did my best. So please enjoy.

*************

"Ross, darling, there you are." Judy Geller greeted her son. "We've looked for you everywhere." His mother pointed at her husband, who strolled slowly behind her.

"Well, now you've found me." Ross said, casting a worried sideway glance at his sister before turning fully to face his parents. He knew that since Monica's divorce her relationship with her mother reached another low point.

"Hello, son. Now, where is that little new grand child of mine?" Jack Geller asked while clapping Ross on the back.

"Oh, uhm, right here." Ross led them to the big window where Monica was now again watching the babies hoping her mother would ignore her.

"Aww, she's precious, Ross. But you always have pretty cute babies." Judy stated with a meaningful look at Monica.

"Your mother is right, Ross. Little Christina is by far the sweetest thing in there." His father added.

After five minutes of silent watching Ross decided to go join Joey and Phoebe in the cafeteria. Jack perked up as soon as his son mentioned the chance of getting something to eat so he went to accompany him.

"You coming, Mon?" Ross asked his sister.

"Sure." Monica answered in the direction of her already leaving brother.

Just as Monica wanted to go after Ross and her father to get away from her mother, Judy started to talk to her.

~*~

Chandler made his way back to Rachel's room. When he saw none off his friends in the hallway in front of it he thought that Rachel was allowed to have visitors now and that they were all in there with her. He didn't want to talk to Monica with all the others there but he was sure that she would come with him to a more private spot if he asked her to.

Chandler was surprised to be alone in the room after he stepped through the door. Well, almost alone, since Rachel was lying asleep in her hospital bed. After he turned around to leave the room again it became clear that Rachel wasn't asleep like Chandler had thought.

"Chandler?" came Rachel's weak voice from the white bed. "You are still here." She added with relief.

Chandler walked over and looked down at her taking in her pale appearance. He noticed her tiredness when she fought to keep her eyes from closing.

"Rachel, maybe you should rest a little more. You had a hard day."

"Where is…" Rachel started but didn't manage to end her sentence.

"Your baby is perfectly fine. She is in good hands." Chandler answered what he believed was her question. "And the others are around here somewhere too." He added.

"Monica?" Rachel questioned. Chandler just nodded and tried to ignore the surprised look on Rachel's face.

"You should really get some sleep now. You have to get better soon for little Christina, ok?" Chandler told Rachel almost whispering. "I'll go find the gang and tell them that they can see you later."

When Rachel nodded lazily, her eyes already closed again, Chandler made his way out of the hospital room. He stood in front of the door again but there was still no sign of anyone familiar. So he made his way to the first place he could think off to search for the rest of the group. He figured they would be visiting the baby. And if he didn't find anyone there he was sure he could at least find Joey. "At the cafeteria." Chandler thought with a smirk on his face. So he went to check the nursery first.

But since the hospital hallways all looked the same to Chandler he decided after a few minutes of walking around to ask a passing nurse for the right directions. Of course he had been going the wrong way so he turned around and walked the way back he came, passing Rachel's room again and traveled on hopefully heading to the baby ward.

After a few turns he got confused again and stopped to re-orientate when he heard a familiar voice behind the next corner. He went a little closer and confirmed that it was Ross talking. Chandler heard that they wanted to head down to the cafeteria, so he took a deep breath to calm himself before turning the corner. But just as Chandler wanted to join the others he stopped dead in his tracks. He heard another voice now. One, that made him realize that he wouldn't go over to them now for all the money in the world.

~*~

"So, Monica…" Judy Geller began what Monica knew would be another praising about what a great human being Ross was and a reminder of what a big failure she was. And sure enough her mother didn't let Monica's lack of an answer stop her.

"Isn't Christina the cutest baby?" Judy started. "I could tell at the first look that she was Ross'. She is by far the prettiest."

"Mhm." Monica still tried to focus on the babies but knew that this was too good of a chance for her mom to let pass.

"Do you realize that this is Ross' second child already?" Judy went on with another side glance at her daughter.

"I'm painfully aware of that." Monica mumbled.

"What was that?" Judy asked but before Monica could repeat what she said or think of something better to say her mother went on again. "I always thought you wanted to have kids too." Judy said.

Monica turned her head to look at her mom, not sure what to make of that comment. It hadn't even sounded accusing or anything. But just as Monica thought she could talk to her mother about her worries and problems Judy Geller proved again what kind of person she was, at least in regard of her daughter.

"But then again you managed to ruin your probably last chance for children." Judy mused as if she didn't know how much that little comment would hurt her youngest child.

~*~

Chandler almost gasped loudly at what he eavesdropped and had to bite his fist to stay quiet. But then he winced because he had bitten down too hard. He stepped away from the corner and hoped that they hadn't heard him. What he listened to had been a shock to him. He knew Judy Geller was sometimes unnecessarily cruel with her comments directed at Monica. But he'd thought even Judy wouldn't stoop that low. He edged his way back to his former position to hear Monica's counter.

~*~

Judy knew the second the words left her mouth that she went too far this time and the wounded look on her daughters face confirmed it. But just as she wanted to take it back Monica lowered her head and spoke up.

"You know what, mom?" Monica started and Judy knew she deserved everything she'd get to hear. "You are right."

That sentence left two people speechless. Chandler couldn't understand how Monica, who never admitted defeat easily, would give up like that without telling her mother off. And Judy saw, maybe for the first time, that her daughter needed her as mother who would listen to her kid's problems and not just criticize it.

But right then as Judy wanted to apologize, Monica went on.

"Yes, you are right. I ruined my chance for being a mother and even worse than that – for being a wife. I drove away that one person that stood by me almost my whole life. The one person I loved…no, love, more than anything." Monica corrected herself. "But I lost him. And I know deep down that I'll never get another chance. Because I don't want anyone but him and it's time to realize that I'll never have him again. I hurt him…so bad." Monica shook her head and suppressed a sob. "And I don't blame him for never wanting to see me again after what I did to him." Monica had tears streaming down her face now. "I regret it. Every day, I'm paying for my horrible mistake. So you see, mom" Monica continued. "You are right. I'll never have this." She turned around to point at the sleeping babies. "I'll never have a child or a family because I don't deserve that. And that is my punishment. So save whatever mean remark you have to throw at me. Because you can't hurt me worse than the pain I'm already in." Monica finished bitterly and turned to go.

But before she got away Judy grabbed her arm and spun her back around. She threw her arms around her crying daughter and pulled her into a long overdue hug. "I'm sorry, Monica. I didn't mean what I said." Judy said with a tear choked voice. "I don't know why I always say things like that to you. But you have to believe me: I don't really mean them." Judy explained. "You are an amazing daughter and I'm sorry that I don't tell you that more often. But I'll work on that."

Monica pulled back and smiled a little through her tears. "Thanks, mom."

Judy hugged her a little harder. "You're welcome, dear."

~*~

Chandler felt a tear run down his cheek so he wiped it away before someone saw it. To say that he was shocked by what he had heard would be an understatement. He never liked to see Monica cry. And hearing her there pouring her heart out and crying over him made him incredibly sad. But it made him also realize that he couldn't talk to Monica. Not then and there at least. So he turned around and went back to his hotel.

TBC...

********

Ok, another chapter done. Woohoo. I can tell you that it's coming to an end now. Maybe one or two more chapters. And hopefully within this year. ;-P Now do your job and review.


	17. Chapter 17

AN: Like always, thank you all very much for the reviews. Your reward is an update less than a month later. How about that? Enjoy!

* * *

"Are you going to be ok?" Judy asked when they broke the hug.

"Yeah, I think so." Monica answered, trying to wipe her tears away.

"Ok, then I'll go and search your father." Judy said. "It's time for us to get back home."

"Ok. I think I'll go visit Rachel. It's long overdue." Monica straightened her shoulders in an effort to find the courage to face her former friend. Now that she was at the hospital she had the urge to go talk to Rachel.

"That's good to hear." Judy lauded her daughter. "You two were such good friends for so long. I hope you can work out a few things."

"Yeah, you are right. I think it's at least time to make the first step and then see where it goes." Monica said and went to go to Rachel's room. Judy observed her daughter with a hint of proud on her expression. She always knew her children grew up to be great people. But that day had been the first day that she had let Monica know how much she really meant to her.

* * *

Monica entered the half-dark room carefully.

"Rachel? Rachel, are you awake?"

Monica froze in her spot when she heard Rachel mumble a name.

"Chandler?"

Monica was sure she had heard right but she couldn't think of a reason why Rachel would say Chandler's name. She took a deep calming breath and decided to wake Rachel. So she could ask her right away what the mention of her ex-husband's name indicated.

Just as she wanted to lie her hand on Rachel's shoulder the door opened and Ross entered the room.

"Is she still asleep?" He asked.

"Yeah, but I'm going to wake her up." Monica explained.

"What? Why would you do that?" Ross wanted to know. But before Monica could give him an answer he went on. "I think it's best if you'll let her sleep. She went through a lot today."

"She only gave birth." Monica was getting irritated. "A lot of women do that every day. I don't think she's too exhausted. And I have to ask her an important question." Monica turned back around to Rachel when Ross' next question stopped her.

"Don't you know?"

"Know what?" Monica queried not sure what to make from Ross' tone.

"Ok, come out into the hallway and I'll tell you…everything." Ross said and led Monica out of the room.

* * *

"Ok, Ross. What is so important?" Monica demanded to know when they joined Phoebe and Joey out in the hallway. So Ross told her everything Chandler had told them before. But he didn't mention Chandler himself.

"Oh my god, that's terrible." Monica mumbled from under the hand covering her mouth in a shocked gesture. "But…she wasn't alone? That man stayed with her? Even during the c-section?" she asked once she composed herself a little.

"Yeah, he was always a great friend." Phoebe whispered to Joey still not able to believe that Chandler had stayed with Rachel during such a bloody situation without bolting or passing out.

"What?" Monica asked having heard what Phoebe said. "Who was always a great friend? Do you know the man that helped Rachel?" she wanted to know.

The other three looked at each other not knowing what to tell Monica. Finally Ross decided that Monica deserved to know the truth.

"It was Chandler." He simply said.

"Wha…? What? How…?" Monica was speechless. She didn't know if she should believe Ross. It sounded weird that Chandler of all people should've been with Rachel. But then a few things came back to her mind. "Oh…That's why Rachel said his name just a few minutes ago. And that's why Joey asked for Chandler before in the waiting room." Monica pondered. "But where is he now? Is he still here? Where is he?!" Monica was getting worked up again over the possibility of meeting Chandler there.

"We don't know." Phoebe said softly. "The last time we saw him he wanted to call a friend."

"Do you think he'll come back?" Monica asked. "Do you think he'll want to see me here?" Monica added unsure but not being able to suppress the hope in her voice.

After a long silence Joey answered her. "We don't know."

* * *

A few days later Monica had lost all hope that Chandler would visit Rachel again or anyone else for that matter. She sat on her couch after cleaning her apartment for the fifth time that week. After a few minutes of relaxing she got up to take a shower. She wanted to visit Rachel at the hospital again. After that eventful day four days ago that ended with a long talk between the two estranged friends Monica tried to see Rachel as often as possible. They managed to put all bad feelings behind them and started to work on their still fragile new friendship.

When Monica stepped through the door two hours later entering Rachel's hospital room she knew something was wrong. It wasn't anything visible just a feeling she got as soon as she saw Joey, Rachel and Phoebe. And the fact that the three stopped whispering as soon as they became aware of her presence didn't help.

"What's going on?" Monica asked eying them suspiciously.

"Oh, nothing." Phoebe answered a little too rushed for Monica to believe it. "We were just…eh…talking about Rachel getting out of the hospital tomorrow." She added.

"Yes, that's right." Rachel nodded.

"And I have to go now." Joey announced. "Big audition." He added before leaving the hospital room.

"Uhm…where are you going to live? You are not staying with your mother, are you?" Monica asked deciding to ignore her friends' weird behavior for now.

"Well, I thought if it's ok with you I would move a little more close again?" Rachel questioned unsure if it was too soon to act like all was good again between them.

"Oh, that would be great!" Phoebe screamed enthusiastically. "Wouldn't it be great?" She asked Monica. Rachel looked at Monica trying to appraise her real feelings about the subject.

Monica only needed to think about it for a few seconds. "Of course, that would be really great." She finally said. "What about Ross? Why don't you move in with him?" Monica suggested.

"Yeah, I already thought of that but I don't think it would be a good idea right now." Rachel told them. "Joey offered me to move into his spare room. But I'm not sure if that isn't a little too close already."

Monica looked at Rachel for a few moments and she could feel that Rachel would really like to move in with Joey but was afraid what Monica would think about that. Monica contemplated the idea but couldn't think of a reason speaking against it. Quite the contrary she found that solution better the longer she thought about it.

"I think you should do it." Monica said making Rachel and Phoebe look up at her with shock written over their faces. "No, really. I think it's a great idea. That way you'd be close to the group, I could see my niece all the time and, well, I would really love to have you around again." Monica explained her decision.

Rachel was so happy about how easy Monica made it all for her that tears started to pool in her eyes. Phoebe saw this and quickly handed her a tissue. Then she took two more tissues out of the box. One for Monica who joined Rachel in her crying and one for herself because she knew she wouldn't be able to hold her own tears back long while her two friends cried out of happiness, practically sealing their new friendship with tears. Phoebe knew that now their friendship would last forever. Sure, it would still take time to build the lost trust back to the way it was before but they all learned their lesson. Nothing is worth betraying your friends for.

The End

Oh no, wait. That's not the end. There's still one little thing to solve. Did Joey get the part he auditioned for? Find out in the next part. ;)

TBC...

* * *

Here is the part where I ask you to review so you can ask me to keep writing. So please don't break down the system and hit the little button down there. I know you want to.


	18. Chapter 18

Thank you all for the fantastic reviews. Without you people reviewing I don't think I would be able to keep writing this.

One scene in here overlaps with a scene from the last part so it's probably a good idea to read chapter 17 again since it was so long ago that I posted it.

Anyway, read and enjoy.

* * *

Rachel couldn't believe the call she just got. She put down the phone beside her hospital bed just as Ross came back into the room, two cups of coffee in his hands.

"Who was that on the phone?" he asked while trying to close the door without drenching himself in the hot liquid he held carefully in front of him. Rachel watched his struggling with a soft smile on her face. After he finally finished the task and sat down next to her bed she remembered the question he asked her before.

"You'll never guess who called." Rachel smiled smugly. She knew how annoyed Ross could get when someone knew something that he didn't know.

"Ra-chel." Ross whined. "Come oooon."

"Ok, ok." Rachel laughed. "But promise me not to go all mental on me."

Ross looked at her with a skeptical expression on his face. He didn't know why Rachel made such a big deal out of one phone call but now he was definitely intrigued.

"Ohh-kay." Ross answered slowly. "I promise I'll stay as calm as possible."

Rachel watched him, trying to decide if that would be enough but finally she wasn't able to hold it in any longer anyway so she just told him and hoped for the best.

"It was Chandler." Ross was speechless.

During the last days he came to the conclusion that his former best friend was gone for good this time. Now he didn't know if it was good or bad that Chandler contacted Rachel. Every time he thought about Chandler he felt incredibly guilty and embarrassed for the way he and the others had acted all those months ago. When he looked at Rachel he saw that she was having similar thoughts.

Ross suppressed the bitter feelings rising up inside of him when he saw Rachel's guilty face. He had sworn to himself that he wouldn't dwell on the mistake Rachel made – mostly for the sake of their daughter – but also because he really valued the friendship he and Rachel shared before the incident and that they were now slowly re-building.

He remembered a discussion he'd had with Monica two days ago. Monica was very confused and sad since she learned that Chandler had been around and that everybody but her had seen him. Ross had mentioned that to her and advised that maybe now was the time to let Chandler go and try to move on.

Monica had stared at Ross for an endless seeming minute and then explained that she knew Chandler would never want to be together with her again but that she'd be happy if he was in her life at least somehow. Even if it was just as a friend.

The look Monica had had in her eyes that moment made Ross realize just how lost and broken his little sister was without Chandler.

And now Chandler had called Rachel. Ross felt a tremendous wave of optimism wash over him. When Chandler was ready to contact Rachel, the person who started all the mess that practically ruined all their lives, it hopefully meant that his best friend since college could forgive him too. 'And maybe,' a small voice in the back of Ross' head whispered 'he's ready to let Monica back into his life.'

* * *

Rachel saw the evolution of Ross' mixed feelings mirrored on his face as he went from stunned over confused to what she hoped was a happy expression. She waited with baited breath that Ross would finally say something. But she knew from former experiences that it could take a while. So she leant back into her bed and tried to relax.

When Ross broke the spell of his confusion a big smile started to brighten his face. Rachel looked up and couldn't help but beam back at him.

"That's great news, Rachel." Ross said. "Does that mean he forgives us and comes back to New York?" Ross went on excitedly.

"Easy, Ross." Rachel laughed. "Let me tell you about the conversation we held and then you can build your own opinion."

* * *

Just as Phoebe wanted to open the door to Rachel's hospital room to let herself and Joey in the knob turned and a happy looking Ross exited the room.

"Hey, Ross!" Phoebe screamed enthusiastically. "You proud father, you don't have to leave just because of us." Phoebe patted him on the arm.

"You know, I'd never leave because of you but I'm going to visit my little girl." Ross told them over his shoulder already on his way to the nursery. Phoebe shook his head a smile on her face and entered the room.

"My, Ross is in a good mood today." She addressed Rachel and Joey nodded his agreement.

"Yeah, and if you two come over here I can tell you what caused that." Rachel lured her friends nearer to the bed, almost bursting with the news she just told Ross.

* * *

Rachel and Phoebe just started discussing the newest gossip while Joey chewed on a candy bar he'd found in his pocket when their conversation was interrupted. This time Monica entered the room causing the three of them to stop talking.

"What's going on?" Monica asked eying them suspiciously.

"Oh, nothing." Phoebe answered a little too rushed for Monica to believe it. "We were just…eh…talking about Rachel getting out of the hospital tomorrow." She added.

"Yes, that's right." Rachel nodded.

* * *

When Monica left half an hour after Joey went to his audition Phoebe and Rachel immediately came back to the topic of the phone call. And when Ross joined them a few minutes later the three of them thought about Chandler's idea and their possibilities to help him.

"I still can't believe he really wants Monica back." Phoebe exclaimed excited.

"Well, I hope it works out like he wants it to." Ross stated pessimistically. "There's so much that could go wrong. I mean, he doesn't even know if Monica would let him back in her life."

"Ross! Of course she'd want him. Didn't you see how hurt she was when we all saw him and she didn't?" Rachel argued.

"Yeah, I guess you are right." Ross sheepishly answered uncomfortably under the fiery glances of the two women.

"Ok. Now let's get to the good part…the planning. I think I know the perfect place Chandler could use." Rachel seemingly enjoyed her role in the conspiracy. It felt like being a real part of the group again.

* * *

Chandler was nervous. He couldn't remember a time in his life when he was as anxious as at that moment. It was the day when he would return to New York. And with a little luck it would be forever. He patted his jacket pocket for the seemingly millionth time to check if his plane ticket didn't magically disappear during the last few seconds.

"Chandler, would you _please_ stop with your nervous habits." His father admonished from his place on the couch. "You'll make a hole in my carpet with your constant back and forth walking. And son, if you check for your ticket one more time I'll have to take it and tear it into many little pieces. Understood?"

Chandler looked at his father with big eyes for a few moments. "Yeah…ok…I guess you are right." He started. "I think I'm just wound up about today."

"You think?" Viktor mumbled. He sat in the chair opposite from Charles and looked almost nauseous after watching Chandler's fidgeting for so long.

Now Chandler spun around to him with a questioning look on his face.

"Look, Chandler. I know today is a big day for you but if you keep this up you'll ruin it…or I'll have to kill you." Viktor joked and was happy to see Chandler smile in response.

"You are right." Chandler said and turned to his father. "Both of you. I have to keep it together. I just wish I'd be in New York already. Y'know, getting the thing started."

Just as Chandler finished a car horn could be heard from the front of the house. Chandler jumped at the sound and raced with his bag outside to the waiting cab.

Viktor and Charles looked at each other and shook their heads. Both men's faces showed the worry they felt for Chandler and the hope that everything would go as planed.

* * *

Everything was like Chandler had imagined it. He stood in Ross' apartment in front of a lovingly set table. They had put the couch and the coffee table against the wall under the big window to get more space in the living room.

When Chandler scanned the room he felt a great sense of thankfulness for his friends. Without them he wouldn't have managed to arrange this romantic scenario. They were all more than thrilled to see Chandler again and to help him with his attempt to win Monica back.

After Chandler overheard the conversation between Monica and her mother at the hospital he realized that he needed Monica in his life as much as she seemed to need him. But he wanted to make their meeting more special than a reunion in a hospital hallway.

So he went back to Las Vegas to think of the perfect way to get back into Monica's life. But when he couldn't think of anything even with the help of his father and Viktor he decided to include his old friends. And who was a better fitting choice for the organization and the communication between them all than Rachel?

He couldn't have made a better decision and two days later he was in New York, on good terms with his old friends and about to fight for his soul mate.

* * *

The idea came from Rachel that they should prepare a situation similar to Monica and Chandler's engagement night. Ross and Rachel picked Chandler up at the airport. Joey was at the final casting for a movie which he kept calling his 'destined chance at a big break' and didn't know what he should be more excited about – Chandler being back in their lives or the casting. Phoebe was out shopping with Monica to keep her away.

A couple of hours after he landed in New York the preparations were finished and Chandler stood in the with flowers and candles decorated room. The ordered food was being kept warm in the oven and the stereo was playing a fitting CD quietly in the background.

Chandler was quite proud of how the room looked and scanned it a last time to make sure everything was perfect. When his eyes reached the table he had an idea and looked down at his watch to make sure he had still enough time to go to the grocery store. He nodded his head when he saw the time and hurriedly left the apartment.

* * *

Monica was more than exhausted when she arrived home after her shopping trip with Phoebe. Her friend had been especially energized and even though Monica loved Phoebe with all her quirky antics she'd found it very hard to keep up with her during their shopping spree. So when Monica finally arrived back home she plopped down on her sofa and promised herself to stay there for the next few hours. That was why the phone didn't even get the tiniest bit of Monica's attention when it started to ring ten minutes later. After the fifth ring the machine took the call.

"Monica?" her brother started his message. "Monica, I know you're at home. Please pick up the phone. It's an emergency." Monica perked up a little at Ross' words and tried to choose if he sounded like there really was an emergency or not.

"Ple-ease," Ross' begging voice came from the machine and Monica decided that he was sincere so she picked up the handset from the coffee table.

"Ross? I'm here. Where's the problem?" she asked with a tired voice.

"Oh, Monica, thank god." Ross said. "I really need your help. Could you please come over here?"

"Ross, I'm really tired. Can't it wait till tomorrow?" Monica pleaded. She really didn't know if she had the energy to leave the apartment again. But at the same time she felt the urge to go and help Ross. "Where's Rachel? Isn't she able to help you?" Monica tried to get out of having to go over to her brother.

"No. Rachel is visiting her father with Christina. She won't be back for the next few hours. I really need your help, Mon." Ross kept bugging. If he couldn't get her to go to his apartment all the hours of decorating were wasted.

Monica hesitated and Ross knew that he had her on the hook now.

"Mon?"

"Okay." Monica sighed. "I'm coming over. But you owe me for this." She added.

Ross was happy that he successfully completed his mission and assured his sister that he would make it up to her.

* * *

She knocked on the door like always and wondered why she never just barged into the other's apartments like they did with hers every day. When no one answered she decided to just enter. She stepped through the door and stopped dead in her tracks.

* * *

Chandler rushed through the streets with a bag in his hands. The errand had taken longer to run than he had thought and now he was running out of time. Another glance at his watch showed him that he would probably be back at Ross' in time.

* * *

Monica gasped at the scene in front of her. Ross' whole apartment was illuminated by the soft glow of hundredths of candles and dark red roses were placed in vases all around the room. A table she'd never seen before was perfectly set with new plates and crystal glasses. The napkins fit the big arrangement of roses in the middle of the white table cloth. Monica went further into the room trying to break the spell of wonderment the atmosphere had on her. Tears built in her eyes. She realized that Ross had probably planned that evening to get back together with Rachel and needed her for some cooking details.

She felt happiness when she thought about Ross and Rachel finally becoming a family in the near future but at the same time it made her aware of her own hopeless situation. She just wanted to look for Ross in the kitchen when a voice behind her made her freeze in mid step.

"You are early."

TBC…

* * *

That's all for now. I just don't seem to be able to finish this thing. Hmm, maybe with the next part. It looks very promising that it will be the last one. But we'll see.

Oh, and since I had a disagreement with our stairs I have lots of time to write, so expect the next part for this and "TOW They Pushed Too Far" soon. For those interested, the stairs won and I ended up with a broken leg and a nice 12 days long internet-less (How the hell did I survive that?) stay at the hospital.

Now please make me happy and review. Right now I really need it.


	19. Chapter 19 Final Chapter

A big THANKS to all who reviewed this story and stayed patient even though it always took me months to update. But all that waiting is over now because here it finally is - the last chapter. Woohoo. I know you probably just want to start reading, so I won't bother you any longer.

This is dedicated to all of you loyal readers.

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Chandler had really hurried to get back to the apartment before Monica arrived. But when he opened the door he saw her standing in the middle of Ross' living room. He watched her for a few moments – she was apparently taking in the romantic setting – and knew without a doubt that he made the right decision in coming back for her.

The day before his father had asked him if he was sure it was a good idea to try to get Monica back. He hadn't known how to answer, how to explain to his father that he wasn't entirely sure if he did the right thing. But even though his head was filled with doubts he felt it in his heart that he had to at least try to get Monica back into his life.

And now with Monica standing just a few feet in front of him all indecision left Chandler and he knew he couldn't fight the fact that the confused looking person sharing the room with him was the woman he would spend the rest of his life – and even eternity – with.

Chandler knew he had to say something soon but he was dreading it.

He thought he was nervous when he wanted to ask Monica to marry him or during the night before their wedding. But now he realized that there is always a greater level of anxiety you can reach.

Because he was absolutely sure he was now more nervous then at all those named days combined.

But he had still Rachel's reassuring words in his ear that she was sure Monica loved him and he believed her. Because if he couldn't bring himself to believe her he wouldn't find the courage to speak to Monica.

He took a deep breath when he saw Monica heading towards Ross' kitchen.

"You are early." He said.

* * *

"Oh my god…Chandler." Monica gasped. Her hand flew to her mouth and she looked like she would faint any second. Chandler took a few steps in her direction placing the champagne bottle he bought on the table on his way.

"Monica?" Chandler asked when she didn't say anything else and kept looking at him with wide eyes. "Are you alright?"

"What…what are you doing here?" Monica questioned finally able to shake the shock from her mind.

"I have a date with your brother." Chandler joked nervously. When Monica didn't react and it became clear that she wanted a better answer Chandler cleared his throat. "I came here to see you."

Monica felt her breath catch in her lungs. "I think we have a few things to talk about." Chandler continued.

"But…I thought you didn't want to see me ever again." Monica replied, heavily taking a seat at the table.

Chandler closed his eyes at the sadness he heard in that statement. "I know I said that a few month ago." Chandler said, following Monica's example and sitting down across from her. "And to be honest, back then I meant it." Chandler didn't want to look into Monica's eyes to see her reaction to his frankness. But he knew he had to say what he felt before they could even try to move past their problems.

"But my feelings about that changed and I had a lot of time to think about the things that happened during the last year…actually I had time to think about my whole life." Chandler added with a smile. "And you know what?" Monica's gaze had dropped down to her hands lying on the table in front of her during Chandler's speech allowing the big salty tears she couldn't manage to suppress to splash onto the wood. But now she lifted her head and locked eyes with Chandler.

"The thinking about you and our situation took way more time then reflecting on my life before we got together." Chandler reached out to grasp Monica's hands in his own but stopped when he saw Monica flinch.

"Y'know, I…I don't think this is a good idea." Monica started crying harder now and even though Chandler wanted to take her hands or do anything just to be near her, to offer some support, he knew Monica wouldn't allow it. So he stayed where he was.

"What do you mean?" He asked her putting his half raised hands back onto the table.

"I mean…Did you know I tried to see you at your book signing?" Monica asked him and got her answer when he shook his head. "But you never came and I think that was a hint. That this…us…we can't get back together." Monica sobbed trying to look away; trying to avoid the look she knew would appear on Chandler's face after her revelation. But she wasn't fast enough.

"See…" she wept indicating to his fallen expression. "All I can do is hurt you. And I don't think I want to risk hurting you again and again." With that she jumped out of the chair and ran out of Ross' apartment. All she wanted was to get away – get away from Chandler, get away from the person she became, a person who hurt other people and mainly the people she loved most.

Just as she wanted to start descending the stairs someone spun her around by grabbing her elbow.

She felt herself being shoved into the wall. But before she could do anything to free herself Chandler took hold of her face and started talking.

"Monica, I won't let you do this." Chandler panted. "I know what I want now and I know that I have to fight for what I want – and I'm ready to do that. So you can run now if you want but it won't change how I feel. I won't give up on us." Chandler paused to catch his breath but before Monica had a chance to respond he whispered "Because I know that deep down you don't want me to give up."

And with that Chandler kissed Monica for the first time in almost a year and he put all his feelings into this one kiss – the love he still felt for her, the faith he had for their relationship, the desperation he had felt during the time he was apart from Monica.

Monica sank into that kiss with her whole being. She pressed her body against Chandler's and wrapped her arms around his neck, letting him take all her worries and insecurities away. Too early for Monica's taste the kiss ended.

"Now you can run away if you want to and hurt me again – even though that's what you want to avoid, it would be the consequence – or you can stay and try to make me happy instead." Chandler took a step away giving her the option to get away. He felt his heart beating so loud he thought Monica had to hear it too. All his hopes dropped when he saw Monica turn to look down the stairway.

* * *

Monica barely threw a glance down the stairs before launching herself into Chandler's arms again.

"How could I run if I want the same things you want?" She asked pecking him quickly on his lips.

Chandler heaved a big sigh of relive and tightened his arms around Monica.

"I love you." He said. It felt good to finally be able to tell her again and to see her face break out into a smile of pure happiness.

"God, I love you too." Monica breathed. "And I'm sorry that…"

"Don't." Chandler stopped Monica and lightly put his hand over her mouth. "Not now. Let's just enjoy the moment for now. You have the rest of your live to apologize." Chandler winked.

Monica laughed and let herself be led back to Ross' apartment.

"I planned a romantic meal and I don't think we should waste it. I even got your favourite champagne." Chandler said before closing the door after them.

The End

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I hope you liked the ending and if you did please tell me so in a review. It was fun to write this - when I wasn't hit by writers block or a massive lack of time ;-). Now, if I remember correctly I still have an unfinished story so if you've ever read it and wait for an update don't worry, I intend to finish that one as well some time. Hopefully soon. ;-) 


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